And Now We Drink Episode 248 with Haley Spades
Self proclaimed “Tequila Girl” Haley Spades joins the table this week. Haley and Matt talk about the ins and outs of the stripping work, some of the busiest places she has worked and how great numbers have been despite the pandemic. Haley also shares some fan encounters and how respectful her fans are. NOLA will always be a special place for Haley. She shares stories of drinking adventures in the city, and about a night filled with stripper poles, alcohol, emergency dental surgery, and cock blocked her friend. Living in LA now, Haley describes her first experience with an earthquake and how finding good Cajun food is hard. On the topic of food, Haley and Matt talk about her current diet and more importantly her cheat meals, or days. One cheat meal lead Haley and friend on an adventure around NYC looking for Spider-Man’s pizzeria. Rounding off the conversation Haley talks about her time dancing in California, thoughts on kids and the future, how she met Stormy Daniel’s but didn’t get her digits, and she reminds handsy patrons, dancers wear heels. Matt and Haley also talk about her future international travel plans and places she would like to visit someday. Content warning: Matt brings up Japan, again.
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Matt Slayer Hailey. What the hell's going on? Welcome.
Haley Spades Hi.
Matt Slayer How's it going? Welcome to the humble abode.
Haley Spades Thank you so much for having me. I'm excited I'm great, actually.
Matt Slayer Awesome. Awesome.
Haley Spades How are you?
Matt Slayer I'm doing well. I'm doing well. I'm actually, like, being on time for once, like, the last couple shows I guess it's all about being like, fuck, yeah, pretending unprofessional. And you were actually earlier, which is a fucking rarity in this business.
Haley Spades I always overestimate the traffic.
Matt Slayer Honestly, if I could add cheers.
Haley Spades By the way.
Haley Spades Oh, my. I spilled it all myself. I always do that.
Matt Slayer 45 seconds into the show, folks, and she's already once. Oh, here we are. You're a brand new starlet into the biz.
Haley Spades I am? Yes.
Matt Slayer Are you enjoying your time so far?
Haley Spades Yeah. I'm having so much fun. Actually, and almost, like, too much fun.
Matt Slayer Too much fun.
Haley Spades How can you have too much fun? I don't know. I guess I'm living that fast life right.
Matt Slayer How is the shock from going from Louisiana to L.A. so far?
Haley Spades Oh, man. It's been almost a year since I have, like, made my move, and it's been great. Actually, but, yeah, it's definitely it was definitely a big culture shock, almost in a sense. But like, now, whenever I go back to New Orleans, I'm like, whoa, Like, New Orleans is just a whole different beast. Now that I look back on it, I don't know how I lived there for so long.
Matt Slayer No one's. There's a whole nother fuckin world.
Haley Spades Yeah. Yeah, I like L.A.. L.A., though, is like. I don't know. It's like, more up my alley. Like, the music scene and everything. Like the partying. I don't know. I'm a little bit of a party girl, so I like it.
Matt Slayer What are you bringing it into? Like what? Glendale shows. Like what's happening?
Haley Spades Man, I was gone to almost every insomniac event for a minute. Like, all the festivals. And what else are they doing? Oh, God. I mean, that's about it. I just. Yeah, I like to go out and go out West Hollywood sometimes with my gay friends. What else am I doing? But I've kind of tone that down a little bit because I've been traveling more so that's a bummer.
Matt Slayer Well, I'm depending on you traveling for work or pleasure. If you're traveling for pleasure, that's awesome. If you're traveling purely for work and that's cutting into your life, that means not as.
Haley Spades That.
Matt Slayer Is good.
Haley Spades You know, it's like both, though. Like, I've been going to Miami because I dance at 11. So, like, that's like, fun and work, you know? So I like that. And then I have a special trip actually next weekend that I'm going out of the country for. That's for work and pleasure, too.
Matt Slayer Where are you going to go?
Haley Spades To Mexico. Yeah.
Matt Slayer We're in Mexico to live. Nice.
Haley Spades Yeah. Yeah.
Matt Slayer It seems like to be the spot recently.
Haley Spades Yeah. I mean, especially if you're really into music. It's like the adult Disneyland for, like, electronic music lovers, as they say.
Matt Slayer I had no idea. All this is this Instagram influencer. Like, I'm going to the.
Haley Spades Yeah, yeah, yeah. But I'm gonna shoot some really nice content out there, so I'm really excited.
Matt Slayer You got someone lined up to shoot it with her?
Haley Spades I do, but I don't want to spill the secrets just yet.
Matt Slayer And I find I don't get the exclusive bond far. I have never actually been dating or actually barely met, so I've only been to Tijuana.
Haley Spades So what did you do in Tijuana? What? Stupid is what everybody doesn't even want.
Matt Slayer Have you been?
Haley Spades No, but I've heard about it because sometimes I go and dance down in San Diego and everybody's like, oh, you know, you crossed the border in Tijuana. They got better strip clubs down there. And I'm like, Oh, my God.
Matt Slayer T.J., doesn't really seem to have strip clubs as much as they just have brothels that look like strip clubs.
Haley Spades Yep, yep. Yeah. That's the whole joke. They're like, if you go to Tijuana, they're better.
Matt Slayer I made the fucking mistake of going into one of the brothels with some friends and thinking it was just a strip club where, like, no extras happened. And I'm working on the table, and I didn't realize at the time, like, the girls can't leave your table as long as you're buying them drinks.
Haley Spades Okay?
Matt Slayer It's called policy or whatever, cause dudes are buying the drugs. You have to stay at the table. My one buddy picked out a girl that he wanted to hook up with, and she had a friend, but like, we had to entertain because she was nervous about entertaining a black man by herself is really kind of fucked up.
Haley Spades Okay.
Matt Slayer Uh, were there, and we're just chillin at the table like my buddy makes the deal, and they go off, and every couple of minutes is girl she doesn't speak English, is just, like, makes that gesture of me. I'm like, no, I'm cool.
Haley Spades Wow.
Matt Slayer And my third friend who had another girl with him who spoke English, was like, Why are you guys here if you're not buying? I'm just like, we're here to support a friend. And, like, I'll, I'll, I'll happily tip all night.
Haley Spades Yeah, yeah. But you're like, I'm not trying to go into one of those bedrooms. Right.
Matt Slayer Well, I also didn't realize I was in a brothel. I thought I was in a circle. You know, as someone who dances you know, happened in strip clubs all over America.
Haley Spades Yeah, I sure.
Matt Slayer Do. And no one's offended when you're like, I don't want extras. I'm just here to be in a strip club.
Haley Spades I'm like, Awesome. You're my customer, right?
Matt Slayer I'm so after the fact, I'm like, Oh, that was just a brothel. I feel really bad about wasting my girls time.
Haley Spades I Oh, don't feel bad. It happens so it's up to the girl, though, at that point, you know, to, like, take the initiative to be like, I'm going to walk away. Well, I mean, if you're buying her drinks, you really couldn't, right?
Matt Slayer Every time she did. Yeah. Know I was tipping her on it.
Haley Spades Yeah. Okay. Well, I mean, you waste our time then, as long as you're tipping her. Yeah, but. But she wanted it like she wanted it, like.
Matt Slayer Well, if you're her dollars per hour, it's like some dude having you at the table and, like, throwing your whole bucks by new drinks versus taking it back for private.
Haley Spades Yeah. I mean, she should have just been like, don't buy me any more drinks. She didn't speak.
Matt Slayer English.
Haley Spades Oh, my God. That's that's tricky. That's how it is in Miami. Kind of a lot of other girls that I work with. I don't speak English, and I'm like, okay, all right.
Matt Slayer Ola how are the Miami strip clubs these days? Because my very first club experience, and this is 20 years ago, was in Miami.
Haley Spades Yeah, well, I only work at 11 and that's like the big daddy of like all strip clubs I find honestly because I've worked all over the country. But 11 is crazy and I mean, honestly, it's the busiest. I've seen a strip club since Pre-pandemic. It's, I think it's busier than ever. It's crazy. It's really good money right now.
Haley Spades It's, I'm going tomorrow I'm jumping on a plane.
Matt Slayer It has to be if you're flying across the country for it.
Haley Spades Mhm. Oh yeah. Yep. Plus they have like a really strict protocol where you have to work once every 28 days to hold a contract there. So if I, if for some reason lapsed that I would lose my contract and have to get hired all over again and that's like I don't want to do that. That was nerve wracking enough.
Matt Slayer Yeah. Don't worry, it's enough. You'll be like I'm famous enough that you guys got to ask me back.
Haley Spades Yeah. Yeah.
Matt Slayer I've been led to believe in. You're going to be out featured in some deals.
Haley Spades Yeah. I'm excited. I'm really excited. I've always loved dancing, especially in the strip clubs. But, like, going the next, like, level and featuring has always been like a dream of mine in a sense, because as a stripper, I would see these girls come in and feature it. I'd be like, Wow, it looks like so much fun, you know, to have people come to a strip club to see you put on a performance, a special one at that.
Haley Spades So I was like, I want to do that.
Matt Slayer Well, and that you can charge and send money from the private team. Yeah.
Haley Spades Oh yeah. And fuck yeah. I'll pay it and I'll pay it.
Matt Slayer I know it's it's fucking nuts. So I started off in the industry as a roadie for girls like Go with features going into conventions like that. So like, I don't know what's on the circuit and it's like it's wild. I mean, it's, it's like really, you guys drove fuckin multiple states away to see this performer.
Haley Spades Yeah.
Matt Slayer And you're just. That's got to be like a paycheck for you, bro. Okay, cool.
Haley Spades You got some diehard fans out there. Like, even at music festivals, I'll have people come up to me because they recognize me, and I'm like, wow. I'm like, no one in the wild.
Matt Slayer Are generally people pretty cool about it?
Haley Spades Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. They're respectful. I've never had anybody, like, weird. I've had a few people would be, like, hesitant, like, they'd be like, Are you Hailey mates? And I'd be like, Yes, I am. And I'd be like, Do you want to take a picture? Because they'd always seem really shy. Like, they thought it was a good idea.
Haley Spades And then they got really scared once I started talking to them. And so I would always be like, Do you want to take a picture tag me? You know, I'm I'm always very nice with my fans whenever I meet them in public. As long as they're respectful, I'm respectful.
Matt Slayer Well, and that's how it should be. I can understand why they'd be nervous because it's like, that's kind of weird, nerve wracking, you know, especially to have you like on a pedestal as a performer. And then you added like, Oh, if I'm wrong, I'm just asking some random woman if like, she's an adult performer.
Haley Spades Yeah, yeah.
Matt Slayer I could go over really poorly if.
Haley Spades Yeah, yeah, it could. I mean, but so far, so good for me. There was one guy I, I was at my in Warrior in October in L.A., and it was one of like the security guards in VIP. Actually, I had a VIP pass, and the security guard came up to me and he hit like, he was very nervous, like, whispering to me.
Haley Spades He was like, Are you my mates? And I was like, Yes, I am. And he was so excited to meet me. He wouldn't even put his arm around. He would barely even touch me for, like, the picture. Like, he was like like I was like, you could touch, you know, like, wrap your arms. I was like it was like he was very respectful, and that's what I appreciate.
Matt Slayer You can't be too careful in this day and age.
Haley Spades Yeah. I mean, it's not a petting zoo out there.
Matt Slayer It's not petting zoo. But it's also just like, well, I got to 100% to make sure that, you know, your recipient of raves is like floating around to every woman yeah. Because the last thing in the world. Do you want to be caught up in some bullshit? Like. Yeah, something as simple as, like, I put my arm.
Haley Spades My hands hold. Yeah, yeah.
Matt Slayer Or some fucking criminal liability or something.
Haley Spades Yeah, absolutely.
Matt Slayer All of a sudden, his, his it's like I'm suing a security guard. He put hands on me.
Haley Spades Yeah, he has assaulted me, you know, he did not. He was very nice.
Matt Slayer You're safe, bro.
Haley Spades You're safe. Good. You're good.
Matt Slayer While you're until. And besides certain content, is there a festival going on? Like, just.
Haley Spades Oh, no, there is not a festival going on actually this upcoming week because they have a lot of events going on. But I mean, it's Harlem. There's always like jungle parties happening. Like, there's always something going on. Like, it's very electronic music based.
Matt Slayer Like jungle music or like jungle like actually, you know, jungle.
Haley Spades House, like jungle house, like think like tribal, like house music. But like.
Matt Slayer I know it's jungle is I just want to. Yeah, it's Mexico. There could be an actual jungle. That's all.
Haley Spades There is. There is actual jungle parties. So the collective's live. You get it on them, like Burning Man, Mayans like I know, like out, like in the jungle. Like you got to trek through the jungle for that. Like, you got, you got that's like you're like a die hard. Like, I'm going to go to a jungle party but they always have something going on.
Haley Spades So I think we're going to be doing that and like, the day clubs, and I think it's like seaweed season right now down there, like crazy. They have a special word for it. I don't know how to say it, but it's like when the seaweed is just so insane that you don't even get in the water. So I'm glad that my Airbnb has a private pool is nice, but yeah, besides content, I think I might, we might go see like the ruins and zip lining.
Haley Spades We're talking about zip lining. Yeah.
Matt Slayer Yeah, it'd be everyone's uploading before I have.
Haley Spades Where did I go? Ziplining in Gatlinburg, Tennessee. That was pretty cool.
Matt Slayer Like over a canyon or some shit or the mountains.
Haley Spades Smoky Mountains.
Matt Slayer Oh, shit.
Haley Spades I think it's Smoky Mountains. Yeah. Yeah.
Matt Slayer That has these Smoky Mountains.
Haley Spades Yes, it was the Smoky Mountains. Yep. That was pretty cool.
Matt Slayer That was rad. One time I've ever gone ziplining this dumb fuckin free mountain Vegas.
Haley Spades Oh, my God.
Matt Slayer That's up. I'm.
Haley Spades No, I don't think I need to. I don't. I don't need to see Vegas is why it's fun.
Matt Slayer You're only like. You're only you're not even that hot.
Haley Spades I would rather do, like, a helicopter ride in Vegas. I think that'd be better.
Matt Slayer The the zip line in downtown Vegas is fun. It's only, like, a couple of blocks, right? Have you been to Fremont?
Haley Spades No.
Matt Slayer Okay, so downtown Vegas has this electric canopy over it, like with your monitors and shit, and you're under the video monitor, so, like, you're barely above street level. It's not, like, insanely high. Okay, as, like, a couple blocks down the fucking road.
Haley Spades Yeah, it's not that bad.
Matt Slayer Like, you go from a maybe three or four storeys up.
Haley Spades Yeah.
Matt Slayer And then just down down the street.
Haley Spades Yeah. That's fun. Yeah. I'm excited to do it and to live. I don't know how high we're going. We'll see. We'll see.
Matt Slayer Like, Oh, this is really fucking high. Oh, shit.
Haley Spades Yeah, I'm really excited to, like, go on a real vacation and, like, go off. I'm like, my meal plan for the first time in, like, eight months. I kind of did it in New Orleans, but I was drinking a lot in New Orleans, so.
Matt Slayer Oh, my God, you're drinking a lot in New Orleans. How did that.
Haley Spades Happen? Or how do I know? I was just drinking a lot in New Orleans. So, like, I was like, battling, like, the hangover the next day and then drinking again. So I didn't really eat a whole lot while I was in New Orleans, which I kind of wish I did. But I know and tell them I'm going to be eating a lot of really good food.
Haley Spades And I'm really excited here that.
Matt Slayer Chances are you'll be healthier than what you would've gotten in New Orleans.
Haley Spades And slowly.
Matt Slayer As someone who lives in New Orleans, please tell me, is there a place you can get a vegetable that's not mixed with something else? Like, I don't think I've ever actually seen a fucking vegetable that was not like part of, you know, gumbo or jambalaya or some shit. I have never seen one in the wild by itself. Yeah.
Haley Spades I mean, usually order a side of vegetables at a restaurant, but it's to be slathered in butter. Right, pony.
Matt Slayer Or made in lard.
Haley Spades Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Matt Slayer I have often said, like, I love is in New Orleans. I could not live there. I would be £500 and sweaty.
Haley Spades Hey, the last time I went, I did something crazy. It was so funny, I, I had been there. I was there for a whole week and I was working almost every night, like at my strip club, the penthouse club in New Orleans. That's like my O.G. Home Club. Love that place. I was working there all week. I was like, Mardi Gras.
Haley Spades Yeah, I'm here. This isn't even that long ago. It was, like, two months ago.
Haley Spades I went back and I was working every night, and I had, like, I had made, like, really good money. I think I had already made, like, $7,000. So, like, my last night there, I went to a parade, and I was like, You know what? I don't need to go to work. So I called up more. Wait, let's rewind.
Haley Spades I was drinking for I thought it was a great idea to start day drinking by myself at like 11 a.m. in the French Quarter cause I was like, this is my city. I know how to handle myself. So I'm drinking, going all these bars that I love like the Hotel Mont Leeanne has this really cool carousel bar. That's where I got kind of lit, and I called up two of my friends and I was like, Hey, come drink with me.
Haley Spades Let's go to the parade. It was muses. And then they came out the cab drinking, and then I instigated a threesome with all of us. And then I woke up in a hotel room and then the French Quarter, our hotel room the next morning with my friends, like my friends that were my friends before I moved to L.A. and I was like, or, oh, I was and I had to do like the 8 a.m. walk of Shame.
Haley Spades But in the French Quarter, during Mardi Gras, in my own city.
Matt Slayer At least in New Orleans, I don't think anyone would notice. So that to him.
Haley Spades Oh, no, everybody was still out, like partying at like eight in the morning. Like it was like I felt like I was one of those gutter punks for a minute. I was like, man, I was like, I am one of these people right now. Like, I was wearing like my alpha, like, what was I was I was around like a pleather skirt, like a nice blouse and heels for classic walk of shame.
Haley Spades Classic.
Matt Slayer I mean, it's only real class. So if you're carrying the hills.
Haley Spades No, no, no, no. I was aware enough.
Matt Slayer Yeah. So you're from there. You know better than to walk on bourbon fucking barefoot.
Haley Spades Oh, man.
Matt Slayer I've seen that.
Haley Spades Shot after.
Matt Slayer That. I've seen that shit. Like, you have to have seen drunk motherfuckers like Walter before them. But remember, what's wrong with.
Haley Spades You here in your tetanus shot? After that.
Matt Slayer You lose a foot.
Haley Spades Yeah, yeah, yeah. That was the last time I went to New Orleans, like, two months ago. Gallo Wild. And I was like, it's time to go back to California.
Matt Slayer Where are your go to drinking spots in New Orleans when they're home?
Haley Spades Ban. It depends on the vibe. I really like the carousel bar. Like, I just said, they have really cool craft cocktails, and it's a carousel bar. Like, it spins super cool. It's in the hotel mottley on. Or there's this new place called the Ghost Bar, which is in the French Quarter. They make like super cool, like craft cocktails, like they smoke and stuff like that.
Haley Spades They have really good espresso martini what else? Oh, if you want something like grungy Backspace and the Gemini, they're like right next to each other. They're actually right by Ghost Bar and then a three legged dog.
Matt Slayer Oh, I've had nice a little three legged dog.
Haley Spades Yeah, three legged dogs. Gurindji, man. That's if like you want to go to a bar and have like bar food where they have a jukebox.
Matt Slayer And my son is a three legged dog. They had a crawfish boil and yeah, oh yeah.
Haley Spades You can get crawfish there. I think one of my friends had gotten crawfish that night that we were all drinking. I remember they were eating crawfish and I was eating like a chicken taco because I hadn't eaten like all day and all I had was alcohol and I was like, I got to eat pro tip.
Matt Slayer The crawfish coming back up from really Doug Burns.
Haley Spades You know.
Matt Slayer I, I hit a lot hard last one. Last time I was there, you know, I went through like a darkened room.
Haley Spades Yeah, I feel, I feel for you. But, man, I love me some crawfish. I don't eat any while I was there, though. How can you? Oh, I don't know.
Matt Slayer I sort of feel such a foul.
Haley Spades I know, I know. I don't know what I was thinking. Like I said, I, for some reason wasn't eating that much. And I was like, why did I not eat a lot? So I got drunk every day I was there. I mean.
Matt Slayer That's the half the point in New Orleans is gluttonous food.
Haley Spades Oh, man. But on my flight back to California, I was like, semi detox in on that point, like sweating like I felt awful. I was like, oh, my God. So when I got back to L.A., I was like, all right, I'm going to be a good girl right now.
Matt Slayer I am sure that flight crew is so used to people coming back. It was like, Yeah, just another flight back from New Orleans.
Haley Spades Yeah, it was crazy. Oh, my God. I felt like I felt like a degenerate in my own city. I felt like my own city chewed me up and spit me out.
Matt Slayer It's nonsense anymore.
Haley Spades You left it in my city. Hey, in my heart it's still as you know. That's where I'm from.
Matt Slayer What was it like actually coming up there? Because pretty much everyone I know that, like, from New Orleans all moved there. Like, as adults.
Haley Spades Well, I mean, I didn't grow up in New Orleans proper. I grew up in the suburbs, which was like 20, 30 minutes out. But still, New Orleans is where you went for all, like the parades for Mardi Gras so growing up there, it was all right. But Mardi Gras was like always like a staple. Like growing up. We always had a week off for Mardi Gras from school.
Matt Slayer That's Falcon one.
Haley Spades Yeah. We had we go for Mardi Gras. So I was so used to that. And then when I turned 18, I went to LSU for one year before I realized I did not like SCC schools and plus like, I don't know, Baton Rouge doesn't I don't know, it wasn't it wasn't my cup of tea. So I started dancing in New Orleans and I was like, Why don't I just go to school in New Orleans so that I transferred and lived in New Orleans from 18 to 22?
Haley Spades Yep. So most of my adulthood was actually in New Orleans, underage drinking, all of it. I was all New Orleans.
Matt Slayer I can't imagine people card that have been in New Orleans at all.
Haley Spades I had a fake, but they still did not have time to even check it.
Matt Slayer Townsville in the general, it's like, Oh, hey, are you tripping? Cool. Yeah, well if you're some 18 year old who's not too hearing me all of a sudden they're maybe like, Hey, can I see some I.D.? Yeah.
Haley Spades Even like the, the short girls like with the, with the what do they call.
Matt Slayer The test tube shots.
Haley Spades Yes, yes. Those girls, they would just be throwing them into your mouth. They don't care how old you are, man.
Matt Slayer I'm making the.
Haley Spades Money. Yeah, they're like, We don't care.
Matt Slayer Everyone's on a hustle in that town.
Haley Spades Oh, yeah. It's very service industry. Heavy, heavy. A lot of my friends that I graduated with in college, they're still in the service industry because that's what pays. You don't go to New Orleans to be a marketing executive or anything. I mean, you can, but still, the jobs are very limited.
Matt Slayer 100%. And like the city, unfortunately, the population is still out to decline. It still hasn't recovered the pre-Katrina numbers.
Haley Spades Yeah. I mean, it's not sustainable unless you're in the service industry. You can't make that great about living there. Honestly, in my opinion, there's a few exceptions. Obviously, you look at the houses on Saint Charles, they're nice you got some big money in the city. But that's not that's not the story for everybody.
Matt Slayer Well, certainly not.
Haley Spades Yeah, everybody's drinking and partying for the most part, selling and drinks behind a bar.
Matt Slayer Yeah. My one of my good friends who's now in Austin moved down there as a writer. He's like, you know, this is we're real writers, you know, cut their teeth.
Haley Spades Okay.
Matt Slayer And he ended up like being a writer slash being like an emcee on bourbon.
Haley Spades Okay.
Matt Slayer So entertaining for tourists.
Haley Spades Yeah.
Matt Slayer And then a couple of other friends who moved down there from Chicago, like, one of them moved down there as bartender, and then now she's managing restaurants and shops.
Haley Spades Yep. Yeah, it's all a service industry.
Matt Slayer It's a great town.
Haley Spades Oh, Mama. When, when, when things like the pandemic hit that hit that city. Hard, hard, hard, hard. So I don't know. I'm glad I'm not there anymore. Like, at least, like, not full time. Like, I go back every once in a while, but I'm glad I'm not there full time.
Matt Slayer God is trying to wiped off the face I.
Haley Spades Mean, literally, it's sinking.
Matt Slayer It's sinking.
Haley Spades I lost like, I think I lost almost two cars to flooding there. I lost one. Definitely like, I had a total car because it flooded just a regular rain shower. Not even like a hurricane, like just a normal random downpour. Lost a car, car total flooded, like up to the windows, like insane. And then the second time I moved my car just in time who I was almost another loss it is like the city is always sinking, always flooding.
Haley Spades Oh, my God. I don't I don't miss that stress now. I just worry about fire and earthquake.
Matt Slayer Don't really have to worry about.
Haley Spades Earthquakes. Oh, no.
Matt Slayer Have you experienced one yet?
Haley Spades I experienced a minor one. I was working at a club and I felt like I was I was driving to I was driving to the club. This is like and I want to say like October or November. And it struck outside of Carson. And I was close enough that whenever I was driving my car, I, I was sitting in a light and I felt like a slight walk away of September.
Haley Spades I felt like a slight wobble. And I had just gotten my car the week prior, so I was like, there's something wrong with my car. And then I was like, wait a second. That was a earthquake. That was like first, like, felt earthquake. But yeah, my car was like and I was like, what's wrong with my car?
Matt Slayer Eventually I'll just be like, whatever.
Haley Spades Yeah. I haven't felt one sense, but yeah, that was the only one I've felt.
Matt Slayer There's only been I've been here since 20, 14 and the only one that even remotely bothered me was like the big one we had in July of 19. Like that was the biggest one that Karl Southern California's had wanted some of the year.
Haley Spades So I'm not that worried about it. I don't own property, so I like.
Matt Slayer Like insurance will cover that shit.
Haley Spades I'm like, well, I don't know. Most places don't even have earthquake insurance and earthquakes. Earthquakes are something that's not usually covered. It's like flood insurance. So that's something that usually exists.
Matt Slayer I think they have supplemental coverage for earthquakes.
Haley Spades Oh man, a few. And far between, though I'm sure it's like flood insurance. Most people don't have it. I didn't have it, but I mean, whenever my car flooded it was still like a total loss. So insurance is like, well, it will pay you out for it. But yeah, it wasn't like something that like, I like paid for.
Haley Spades Exactly. I already I just had full coverage I thought it was.
Matt Slayer Good to cover the loss.
Haley Spades Of my God. Yeah. They actually gave me more than that piece of junk was worth it.
Matt Slayer It was simple. Something like that was an act of God. Sorry. Your fault.
Haley Spades Yeah. Yeah, yeah.
Matt Slayer Yeah. But even, like, the bigger ones, that one was, you know, decent size. It definitely rattled the schedulers.
Haley Spades Oh, like.
Matt Slayer In the hallway I'm like, Oh, that's a real fucking earthquake.
Haley Spades Yeah.
Matt Slayer And what sucks was one of my buddies was in from Chicago, and that first day in California ever just here visiting me, and that happens to California telling me I shouldn't be here.
Haley Spades Oh, I got it to work, man. That's funny.
Matt Slayer And I'm just happy that happened when it happened, because I had just gotten off the can, and we were about to get my elevator, so, like, perfect timing.
Haley Spades Yeah, I always hear stories about that, and people are like, Oh, I was on the toilet. And there was an earthquake. I don't know. What is the joke behind that? Is it just like something, you know, people are like, Oh, my God.
Matt Slayer I don't know if I'm in the middle of taking a shit and the world starts shaking. That's not where I want to be.
Haley Spades Caught with their pants down. Right.
Matt Slayer If I have to break it very quickly, I don't want to have to make it quickly and then go back quickly.
Haley Spades And I go, Yeah.
Matt Slayer I want to be relaxed when I take a shit. Like I don't want him to be a high stress situation.
Haley Spades Yeah, I know for a minute I never meant taking a ship's like, very, like it's very stressful. Yeah.
Matt Slayer Well, it's nothing important to, you.
Haley Spades Know, I'm on a high protein diet so it's, like, not pleasant.
Haley Spades I'd rather just get it done and over with and go about my life you know.
Matt Slayer Not on your phone now there's just gripping on the sides and like, okay, time for lift off.
Haley Spades Yeah, pretty much. That's what happens when you're on high protein diet, everybody. Yeah.
Matt Slayer I mean, just look at my fridge. I'm on a fairly high protein diet, too. Yeah, well, we want to grab the white, cause Haley looked utterly shocked that, like, you're a single dude. What? There's food in there. The the results, I'd be surprised.
Haley Spades A lot of people don't even have food on average. I mean.
Matt Slayer Oh, if you were here, like, 40 years ago, there was no food, no.
Haley Spades Catch you on a good day, huh?
Matt Slayer It was one of those, like, oh, yeah. I need to actually, like, stop eating out for a minute and, like, stock up.
Haley Spades Yeah. Yeah, it it's expensive. It's something I've learned. I like being on a meal plan and cooking all my own food and being super healthy, my chicken and rice. You know, I realize I spend so much less money on food now. Like, I'm going to Miami and I'm actually bringing food the same. Last time I went to Miami, I didn't bring food.
Matt Slayer To bring in food.
Haley Spades I'm like, yeah, I'm very. Yeah, well, I mean, I'm trying to like extra snatch hotel room, but I do have a cheat day on Friday. Like, that's like every it's every week on the weekend. I have one cheat day, and that's Friday of this week. So we're going to we're going enjoy some good food. Don't worry.
Matt Slayer What happens on the Tuesday? What's your team meal?
Haley Spades Oh, man. I usually stick to the same thing. And it's usually only like I'm suppose I only have like a cheat meal, but whenever I travel, I make it into like a day. I don't tell my coach but my go to is usually it's either like sushi or ramen or a vegan burger because I don't eat red meat so I like a vegan hamburger, like from Monte's in L.A..
Haley Spades Oh, my head's a hit. But you know that that's fine when you crave a burger. But I don't eat red meat, so that's why it's a cheat for me.
Matt Slayer Why do you not eat red meat?
Haley Spades It doesn't agree with me. Like, I'm immediately really sick and I haven't eaten this since I was like 14. Oh, that's what.
Matt Slayer Makes you sick. You're not just eating and you just start to train yourself.
Haley Spades No, I'd rather not. I don't know. I like cows. Moo.
Matt Slayer I like how. Sit inside.
Haley Spades No, no, no. I don't want to eat. And it doesn't make me feel good. Like, lean, lean. White meat, like chicken turkey fish even. Like, that's what I can, like, pretty much stomach.
Matt Slayer No pork either.
Haley Spades No, no pork. Oh, no.
Matt Slayer The other white meat.
Haley Spades No, but pork. Pork, maybe really ill like as a kid, like, it was like actually the first thing I cut out, I was like, I cannot ithis. And then I cut out the red meat, like, the red meat and total like the beef because I didn't really like it. Every once in a while, I crave a burger. I just got a vegan one.
Matt Slayer You gave up bacon? Oh, it's so sad.
Haley Spades Hey, Turkey, bacon's not that bad or you're like or vegan bacon. Hey, they have really good vegan bacon. I haven't had it in a while, but it's really good for a smart life, I think. I don't know. It's really good to get it. Whole Foods is really frickin good.
Matt Slayer I don't believe you. Do not believe you.
Haley Spades Yeah.
Matt Slayer Turkey bacon. Bacon's always way too fucking dry.
Haley Spades Yeah, that's all right. Those are my usual cheat meals. Oh, I think I love that. Oh, man.
Matt Slayer There's sushi is a cheat meal. But now Sushi. Good for you.
Haley Spades I know it's a weird cheat meal, or I think the only time I've ever had something really unhealthy was when I had pizza in New York City. I was in New York City, and so I was like, I'm going to have New York pizza.
Matt Slayer You have to.
Haley Spades Yeah, I had it from what's the one from Spider-Man? It's like, famous.
Matt Slayer So many famous New York.
Haley Spades No, no. It's like, oh, man, it's from Spider. It's for the Spider-Man movie. But lately.
Matt Slayer School, Sam Raimi ones are like, no.
Haley Spades It's. Oh, man, what is it? Freaking cool. I don't even know. I don't remember. It's called, but literally, the O.G. location, the one that was in the Spider-Man movies has like a like a like some, like for Spider-Man, like, it has like a Spider-Man moment. And it and my friend and I, we took us like 2 hours to get that frickin pizza because he had a car and he asked us to the wrong one, like, we have, like, fake ones that, like, have, like, the same name.
Haley Spades I wish I remember the name Jesus of the J.
Matt Slayer I think Joe's or something like.
Haley Spades Yes, it is. Okay, it is Joe's. Hey, you got it right. I was like, it's order of the day. Yeah. It was just pizza. And we accidentally GPS to the wrong one, and we realized that it was the wrong one. It wasn't Joe's Pizza. It was a fake Joe's. It was a catfish and we were supposed to go see a Broadway show, and we were running so behind.
Haley Spades But you know what? We made it to the right Joe's. I got my Joe's pizza, and then we went to the Broadway show like, we showed up like, 30 minutes late. And I usually not supposed to show up late because you're, like, interrupting, but we, like, busted up through those doors, and we're like, Hey, we're here for the show.
Haley Spades We're, like, late. And they just, like, wave us. And we didn't even go through, like, the metal detectors. They were just like, get them in there because we busted their those doors like, run in, like, oh, my God, we're late. Broadway shows aren't cheap. Oh, my God. It was like $250 a ticket. We saw the one, The Book of Mormon Lies.
Matt Slayer Yeah, some Matt Parker. Trey Stone shit. Oh, yeah.
Haley Spades Yep, yep. Yeah. But, man, that that was, that was it. That was a whole event. And just getting that pizza for me. Don't drive in New York. You're better off taking the subway or walking.
Matt Slayer 100% or just take a cab when you have.
Haley Spades To. Yeah. Oh, man. Oh, yeah. It took me like 2 hours to get that pizza but we did go to the wrong Joe's first, so.
Matt Slayer Partially your fault.
Haley Spades Not my fault.
Matt Slayer All your friends.
Haley Spades All my friends. Well, not my fault.
Matt Slayer Aren't you navigated? You're in shotgun you're supposed to navigate.
Haley Spades Yeah, and he had been staying in New York for, like, three months at that point, so I was like, no, you should know better. This is a very sacred cheat meal for me.
Matt Slayer Where have you cheated? So where have you done cheat meals? Not cheated in L.A..
Haley Spades Where you cheated in L.A.? No, I haven't cheated in by cheat meals specifically or for ramen Katsu nor cos it's the hand the original hand roll place in downtown L.A. Castle Nori or something like that. Oh, something like that. It's the original hand roll. Like, they're like, you just go sit there and they give you hand rolls. It's nice.
Haley Spades Yeah, it's. It's good. Classic, simple. Keep it, you know, you keep it simple. You keep it easy. Or. Oh, my God. What is the ramen place that I love? Jesus. Oh, my God. I'm literally, like, blanking on everything. Yeah, it's like, okay, I don't remember the name of it. Tatsu. Tatsu. Yes, I so I was like, what's the name of it?
Haley Spades Tatsu Ramon's really good. And then Monte is that. That's about it for L.A.. Otherwise, like, I was traveling whenever I had a cheat meal.
Matt Slayer Have you been to do me yet?
Haley Spades No. It is that.
Matt Slayer It is vegan. Like soul food.
Haley Spades Oh, soul food. Hey, talking to somebody from New Orleans.
Matt Slayer This must be really fucking good. I have never been but it's in Hollywood. It's supposed to be really fucking.
Haley Spades New Orleans is known for soul food. It's like saying, go it, go eat crawfish in L.A..
Matt Slayer I mean, I've done it. Oh.
Haley Spades Chinese crawfish. No frozen Chinese crawfish. But it's not fresh stuff. It's not fresh and desperate.
Matt Slayer To.
Haley Spades Boil happening back there.
Matt Slayer Desperate times.
Haley Spades Yeah, them.
Matt Slayer There's a ton of like, you know, Cajun seafood places in a bag.
Haley Spades I haven't had any of them yet. I don't know if I want to risk it, especially a cheat meal of mine. Oh, my God. Well, I would be mad.
Matt Slayer Crawfish, all protein that.
Haley Spades No nova. If it was bad, I would be so mad if I went to one of these Cajun seafood places in L.A. and it was garbage, I would be mad.
Matt Slayer Coming from New Orleans. I can't recommend it be like, Oh, yeah, it will be amazing. I can't do it. I can't do it in good conscience. No ill will look back on me like that motherfucker lied to me.
Haley Spades Yeah, but I don't know. I just I don't trust it. And I think after April, I'm going to, like, kind of deviate off of my meal plan so that I'll have more freedom. Maybe I won't feel so bad about trying it one day.
Matt Slayer It's crawfish. How is that, really? And it's all protein.
Haley Spades I don't trust crawfish now. Hey, what?
Matt Slayer The Nassau cheat meal is just not a meal you trust.
Haley Spades Yeah, in general, well, I mean.
Matt Slayer Every once while, it's it's like I got stressed. It's. I'm not going to jump on a plane, too.
Haley Spades I would. I would do it right now. It's crawfish season in New Orleans until about June, May. It's crawfish season. And when right now is the time to eat it. They're like big, juicy pork. Fat, crawfish. You want those big, big ol boys at the big claws.
Matt Slayer Is not in the budget in the time to run in New Orleans right now.
Haley Spades Hey, Jazz Fest is coming up.
Matt Slayer Oh, yeah. I didn't ever want to go to New Orleans for a major festival, by the way.
Haley Spades Jazz Fest. Oh, it's it's a little hot. I've been there. Ooh, every time I went, I was like.
Matt Slayer Oh, it's just hot. It's also like crowds of just ignorant tourists.
Haley Spades Jazz Fest isn't really so. I mean, there is tourists, but Jazz Fest is actually something that a lot of the locals go to because it's like a lot of New Orleans music.
Matt Slayer Well, I know it's better than a bunch of.
Haley Spades Other, like, voodoo faster. Okay. Oh, yeah. A lot of. Yeah.
Matt Slayer All I know is one of the times I was in New Orleans was like, during one of the home openers for one of the sports teams on the corner was bad enough at that point. So it's just like, yeah, I don't really want to be here when it's like, I'm actually like, people travel in for this type of thing.
Matt Slayer I would rather just be here on a random fucking Tuesday.
Haley Spades Yeah. Oh, yeah, yeah, for sure. And that's still it's still enough for, you know, all the Mardi Gras week. I was again lit like.
Matt Slayer I want to drink of professionals. I don't want to be surrounded by a fucking bunch of people who can't hold their fucking blues.
Haley Spades Yep, yep.
Matt Slayer And unfortunately that no one's from certain people.
Haley Spades Yeah, you know what? I like to call New Orleans. Let's call New Orleans, LA Vegas, but with character and a little bit of grime, Vegas is very, I don't know, clean in a sense. And very, you know, you know, I don't know. Vegas is just I don't know, Vegas and New Orleans are very similar, but but they have their differences.
Haley Spades And I find that New Orleans is like the grunge year, like.
Matt Slayer It definitely is. So I've been to Vegas multiple times before I ever went to New Orleans. I'm the first of all, interneurons. Like, how did Vegas get the title? Sin City?
Haley Spades Oh, yeah. Yeah.
Matt Slayer And one of the things I like about new ones versus Vegas is Vegas is very segregated. Like the lower income folks are either drinking it like bars on the strip or walking the strip with like giant margaritas and shit like that where like the wealthier that are in like the ultra clubs and shit like that, everyone's just not on bourbon.
Haley Spades Yeah.
Matt Slayer Rich, poor. Everyone's just out on fucking bourbon.
Haley Spades Locals. There I was, I was out on bourbon all the time and.
Matt Slayer Yeah, and the locals don't go anywhere near the Vegas Strip. Like I lived in Vegas for a couple of years. The only time I would go anywhere near the fucking strip is like Restaurant Week because all the restaurants are fucking there. I'll show the House of Blues because that's fucking a casino or some friend was in from out of town, like, let's go to the strip.
Matt Slayer Otherwise you could not pay me to go to the fucking strip. Yeah, the best you can give me to do is like, Yeah, let's go downtown Vegas because there's some grimy old casinos down there.
Haley Spades Yeah.
Matt Slayer But otherwise couldn't pay me. And I know plenty of people that live in New Orleans. Well, yeah. Go strip.
Haley Spades Yeah, go. Oh, little bourbon. Yeah, yeah. I had no problem with it. And that's like, you know, looking back on it, even like being under 21 man, I don't want to say I had a drinking problem, but drinking was definitely a part of like my routine. Like, and in New Orleans, there's always something happening. There's always like a food festival or, you know, there's always something going on or you have friends visiting or like, I don't know you.
Haley Spades For me, I would pass the test and I'd be like, Let's go out, let's go drink. You know, I lived in a high rise for two years in New Orleans. That was awesome. Glad I got that out of my system, though, because I lived in downtown New Orleans. I could just walk to any bar I want. I had a bar downstairs.
Matt Slayer Downstairs, and I was in the CBD.
Haley Spades Nice CBD. Yeah. I had a I was staying it's part of the loft, the loft hotel. So I was right off of Canal Street, two blocks from Bourbon. Glad I got that stuff because, man, that was a while time. It was just like drinking is just part of the culture there. And I don't want to like I like I said, I didn't really have a drinking problem, but I was drinking more than I should have probably.
Haley Spades Especially at that age.
Matt Slayer You're not dead. It wasn't a problem.
Haley Spades Hey, I'm alive right now. I'm alive and healthy and strong.
Matt Slayer Exactly like this. Is not an interview from the afterlife. You're fine.
Haley Spades Yeah, but if I still live there, like, I had a couple of friends go off the deep end around my age, you know, like getting DUI is.
Matt Slayer How do you get a DUI in New Orleans? How do you do that?
Haley Spades How do you want to know how she got it? Yes, she wrecked her car. It's how she got the DUI.
Matt Slayer She was still there when the cops showed up.
Haley Spades So what had happened from what I remember, I'm not going to say her name because I don't owe her privacy because we're we're not even really friends anymore, because she was so bad off and on a bad path. That I had to separate myself while living in New Orleans. I had to, like, be like, whoa, you're going to crazy a to like now.
Haley Spades But she she was drinking and she was driving a car around like a roundabout and didn't make the round. She just went straight.
Matt Slayer To one of those Internet videos of someone launching themselves over the fucking roundabout.
Haley Spades Well, she didn't launch over, but she like, she got onto it and then just crashed into a light pole. So she didn't hurt anybody or herself, but she definitely told her car and she didn't have her ID or anything on her. And she, she wasn't a New Orleans resident like she was from out of state, so they couldn't confiscate her ID.
Haley Spades Right. So she got this DUI. I, I heard from her like two days later. She's like, I just got out of jail because I had a DUI and I was like, whoa. And she was like, I don't know where my car is because she had to, like, sign it off. You know, it wasn't even her car is like her parent's car, but she had to pay it off and tell her parents.
Haley Spades She just paid it off and sold it when reality she wrecked it and totaled it and it was scrap. But yeah, she she was just so far off the deep end. And I was like me even after her DUI, she was still drinking, you know? And some people, they go down like that really dangerous, real. And me going back in February and drinking every single day, I was there.
Haley Spades I was like, I I'm glad I do not live here anymore.
Matt Slayer So then that kind of shit is why I don't live there.
Haley Spades Because.
Matt Slayer I can imagine.
Haley Spades You just get sucked into it. You honestly like it's not like you're like a scratching alcoholic. Like, I'm like, I need a drink. Like, you know, it's just that's the lifestyle.
Matt Slayer It's the culture. Like, bars are very much part of the social scene.
Haley Spades Spend 24 hours. It's the closer to hours a day to clean.
Matt Slayer Or if they like you, they don't.
Haley Spades Yeah. Yeah, pretty much.
Matt Slayer Do you ever drink at steaks and drinks?
Haley Spades Yeah, once. I only do that once at once.
Matt Slayer I've been there more times than you and.
Haley Spades I was I was in the CBD French Quarter area so it always go to like back space or Gemini or through like a dog man. I remember a three legged dog, like five in the morning. It's like you know, it's the same people in their oven and drink and go to the jukebox and play a song on there.
Haley Spades Yep. That was like, I think that was probably the greatest place I'd probably had been to besides Steak and Jake's. But I would go to a three legged dog regularly because I was close to it.
Matt Slayer Yeah, hell yeah. I'll never make it to the country club once.
Haley Spades I don't know. It wasn't really my I don't know, I didn't swim in it because everybody went there. Everybody I knew went there. I would go to the Chloe, which was my ex-boyfriend's like hotel that he worked at. So he would go there sometimes before I moved out here or else that, I don't know, like the the pool country club wasn't really my thing.
Haley Spades I had a rooftop pool. Oh, nice thing. So I was like.
Matt Slayer There was one business. I got dragged there by a buddy of mine, and I had no idea that, like, this is still one. It was a full nude pool. I roll in there and like, you know, just like I'm going to meet him at the bar. He just comes out like dick swinging out of the bar. What's up, man?
Haley Spades Now it's just topless.
Matt Slayer I know. I've heard his disciples now, but, like, this is long enough ago that it was full neutered. Yeah, it just comes out, like, out to the bar, dick swinging. I'm like, Hey, what's going on, man?
Haley Spades Hey, are you going to collapse? I've been there. I was there. I was there underage. I lived in the CBD. You know what I'm talking about, right? The swingers club. Yeah. Yeah, I lived a block from there, and it was actually Mardi Gras circa. I want to say 20th 1828. I think it was 2018. I think. I definitely, I don't know, I was 20, so I think it was 20, 18.
Haley Spades I was 20 years old. I had a fake ID me and my friend and my ex-boyfriend. That's why we decided, hey, let's go get daiquiris. And then go to a parade. So we did that and then, you know, we're, we're walking past Collette's the swingers club and me and my friend are like, we want to go in there.
Haley Spades My only go, go see like return, you know, it's Mardi Gras. All right, girl, I was going to college and we go in there. My friend decides she just wants to get banged out. I don't even know what the heck happened there. And then there's there's a stripper pole in the club, and I'm drunk underage in this swingers club, and I decide I'm going to get on the stripper pole.
Matt Slayer Where you are a professional dancer.
Haley Spades Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. I was dancing from 18, but you don't do it when you're drunk. You don't get on the pole like that.
Matt Slayer I mean, I know. It's horrible. Wow.
Haley Spades Oh, man. You want. Know what happens, though? I chose my tooth. I fell. I fell. Off the pole, chipped my front tooth during Mardi Gras, woke up the next day, like, oh, my God. My truth is, my tooth is checked. I need to fix this. I can work in the clubs, Mardi Gras. So I call up every nearest dentist, and I'm like, hey, I to this shit, and somebody's got me.
Haley Spades And they're like, yeah, this is considered an emergency because it's the front tooth so I go into this dentist's office, which is actually in downtown New Orleans. He's like, So where are you visiting from? Like, I live down the street. I'm a local. I just go to crazy. I'll try. I like my craziest story of New Orleans. I chip my tooth during Mardi Gras as a local, you know, it's like four 50 to have my tooth bonded back together.
Matt Slayer In a swingers.
Haley Spades Club and a swingers club. I yeah, that's a story I will always remember and tell because that's pretty funny.
Matt Slayer Was that the end of the night when you substituted or did?
Haley Spades Oh, man, no. I was drunk and like, my friend was getting banged out by somebody. I was like, I started to get worried about her, and I started, like, crying, like, over well, like drunk crying, like, overwhelmed us. Like we had to leave. I was like, we got to leave. I was like, this is a feel. Okay? And then we went back to my apartment and I felt like tooth was loose.
Haley Spades And that's when I realized I had chipped it. I didn't I didn't I didn't realize in the club the swingers club, I didn't realize it there. I was just like, focus on getting everybody out of there and home back to my place.
Matt Slayer Did you lose such a friend finish or did you cock block your friend?
Haley Spades I don't remember.
Matt Slayer You talk about your friend.
Haley Spades Probably cock block there. Oh, crying. I was like, I remember. I remember sobbing in there.
Matt Slayer Was such a dick move you wanted to find out. Why would you not let her finish? I don't know.
Haley Spades I remember sobbing in there, though, and I was like, we, you know, and then and then we went back to my place and I remember, like, being like, oh, I got my tooth. And then I pulled off the piece of my two or I didn't hurt. Like, it was like hanging there, but, like, I was like, why is I to feel like this?
Haley Spades It was like, oh, sobering up. And I was laying there. There it went.
Matt Slayer How did your boyfriend at the time react all this?
Haley Spades Oh, man. I think he was trying to get it on at the club, too, but I was like, too wild and drunk, and I don't remember. I don't remember what he said that night, but I remember the next morning, I was like, Wake up, wake up. As I do with my tooth. I was like, Wake up. I too.
Haley Spades He was like, oh, my God. He wasn't like mad. I think he was just kind of like Hayley what did you do?
Haley Spades I was like, Oh, my God, I don't even know what. I don't even know what happened. And then I remember my one of my friends that had came with us to the club. She was like, she actually had a video of me falling off that pole.
Haley Spades And it was probably the moment that I had chipped my tooth.
Matt Slayer Like, Did you fall face plant?
Haley Spades No, no, no. I was like, I was trying to do something, like, kind of upside down. I didn't, like, fall like I felt like back, like booty back, like, like I was like, hold the pole and like, my button, my lower back hit the floor. So, like, not like my face but.
Matt Slayer How'd you trip?
Haley Spades I don't know. I don't know. I think it was just like, the impact I think I might like. It was like the side. I think, like, I felt like sideways kind of in a sense. But I didn't like face plant. I think I fell sideways. That's only one. That's my only one of my teeth.
Matt Slayer Hey, listen, I didn't bite your tongue off for some shit.
Haley Spades Oh, man. Yeah. And I guess it was fixable. Right now, and they did a good job. All right? You can't even tell I had my tooth.
Matt Slayer I would never know if you hadn't told me. I would have.
Haley Spades Never. No, no. I mean, you still. You can't even tell. If you look at it, he did a really good job.
Matt Slayer Polys can't tell. We're going to inspect the tooth. I've got.
Haley Spades No yep. That's my crazy New Orleans story. Probably the craziest one ever besides my threesome story from two weeks ago.
Matt Slayer Well, and with the threesome story, I want to circle back to that record. You had you hooked up with this friends before?
Haley Spades No, but it's funny, because the friends, it was one of my girlfriends and one of my girlfriends they had actually hooked up separately. And for some reason, well, they were the only ones that were available to hang out with me. The guy friend, he was working until six. And the girlfriend, she was like, oh, yeah, like, let me get ready and I can come meet you.
Haley Spades Me and her got together first, and then we called up the other guy. The guy friend and we met him, a three legged dog. The three met and we like walked two, three like a dog and then went to the parade. So they had already been hooking up like a little bit and so I think that's what sparked it in my mind.
Haley Spades And I was like We're about to have some fun. I definitely instigated it. That was me and the guy friend. He was all about it. He was my ex. He's like one of my ex best friends.
Matt Slayer So he's wanted to bang you for a while?
Haley Spades Probably, yeah. I mean, he knows. He knows I am now an adult performer, you know, he knows I do porn, so he was it was all over it. Whenever I left, he was like, he sure let me hit it one more time. I like that was a one and done thing, my friend.
Matt Slayer Don't be thirsty. Dude.
Haley Spades So I was like, mm, now.
Matt Slayer Who definition or who definition?
Haley Spades Yeah, that my friend. Not me. I told him I was like, Do not give to me. I was like, No.
Matt Slayer Good. On him. Good. I'm if he's going to have repeat business there, you always finish in the one dojo in three. Somebody's got to finish in the person that you're attached to. Yeah, we're just it's you start popping up when you finish what job I.
Haley Spades Was all about that I was like, do not finish. I mean.
Matt Slayer You try and do. No, no, no.
Haley Spades This is like like a panic moment I had. I was like, oh my God, I remember. I remember.
Matt Slayer That. Was it protected or unprotected?
Haley Spades I was unprotected. I actually I knew my friend, my female friend was was good, like from eyes. But my guy friend, I was like, he's a little bit promiscuous. So I texted him the next morning and I was like, when was the last time you were testing I came to L.A. and I got my panel done right after, but I was like, kind of like, oh, my God, if I pop or something, it's him.
Haley Spades But he was like, Oh, he was like, I had mine like a month ago. Like, you don't have anything to worry about. And I didn't have anything to worry about, but I don't I don't I don't want to do that. I don't want to be like.
Matt Slayer No, no, no judgment.
Haley Spades No. But like, that happens you know, like, people go and fuck people outside of the pool and then they bring something in. And I was like, oh, no. That's how I got tested. As soon as I came back and there was no.
Matt Slayer Way to be someone the way to be. But also it happens.
Haley Spades It happens in his life, like zero fucking judgments.
Matt Slayer Zero. Yeah.
Haley Spades I was like, but like the next morning it was like I had that, that that clarity moment. I was like, What did I do?
Matt Slayer You got your. That's fucked.
Haley Spades That's what happened. I got bug, right?
Matt Slayer You got yours. That's what fucking matters. There is zero shame in that shit.
Haley Spades Yeah, I was just like, oh, man, if I put myself out of work for this other thing was fine.
Matt Slayer In reality, you're probably the worst you get is a porno. Called me out for a week and a half.
Haley Spades Yeah, exactly. I was like, it's fine. And I was fine.
Matt Slayer That's the thing about this. This is like, for the most part, it's just like, oh, man, I'm going to.
Haley Spades Take a pill and chill out for a week.
Matt Slayer Right? Honestly, the hardest part for me was like, Oh, well, fuck, I can't drink for a week and a half. I'm on antibiotics.
Haley Spades Yeah, yeah, yep, yep.
Matt Slayer I've been the one time. It's only been the one time. Knock on fucking.
Haley Spades Wood. Good good. Knock on that would help me too. And I don't know what.
Matt Slayer Fucking civilian I was thinking I was.
Haley Spades It happens.
Matt Slayer It does.
Haley Spades And I've got to end the stigma around that shit. So many people, it seems serious nowadays, like motion treated by a pill.
Matt Slayer Like for real. For fucking real. I mean, the worst us this pregnancy. I mean, honest yeah.
Haley Spades That then that's a whole different. That's a whole different ball part, right?
Matt Slayer It's expensive to get rid of it. Don't get rid of it. Then you're. Oh.
Haley Spades Then it's expensive. Regardless, it's expensive forever.
Matt Slayer Then you're stuck with someone for fuck.
Haley Spades That your thought you got. Yeah. You got something connecting gets you for the rest of your goddamn lives.
Matt Slayer Are you and not one to have kids person.
Haley Spades I it depends. So for the longest I didn't really want kids but sometimes I think maybe eventually I like to have a family. But not right now.
Matt Slayer Well, obviously.
Haley Spades Not right now. Oh, my God, I'm too young for that. Like, later on down the line, if I meet the right person and I'm like, I would like to build something with you, but like, I don't know. It's not like something. I'm like, I want to have five kids and I have a farm kind of thing. No, it's just like if I meet the right person kind of thing and I'm like, well.
Matt Slayer I'm sure growing up in the south, there are definitely some people, some of your peers that are definitely like that.
Haley Spades I'm going to have fight. Yeah, I'm going to have five kids and have a farm, and I'm gonna live in the same city. I grew up and know that's not me.
Matt Slayer That's not 1800 shit.
Haley Spades Oh.
Matt Slayer Like I understand back in the day I needed to do that because half of them were going to fucking die and you need someone to work the farm.
Haley Spades Also, like buy. Do you want to stay in the same place you grew up in?
Matt Slayer Y because it's comfortable. Most people don't want to be out of their comfort zone.
Haley Spades Yeah, I'm like, man, I was, I was eager to get out of my hometown. I was like, I'm ready to go. Even like leaving New Orleans, I didn't grow up in New Orleans proper, but even live in New Orleans, I have so many friends, like my ex-boyfriend lives in New Orleans, so and I was like, Why don't you people want to leave here?
Haley Spades Leave the city? You guys have Bright like my boyfriend, my ex-boyfriend, he was like in the music industry, like he was producing deejaying, you know? And I was like, at the time, I was I was just joining the adult industry and I was like, why don't you come to L.A.? That's where you grow as a DJ. And he was so against it.
Haley Spades And I was like, all right.
Matt Slayer Is that why you two broke up?
Haley Spades Yeah. He didn't want to come to L.A. Well, fuck people.
Matt Slayer No ambition. I mean, don't actually don't fight people. No ambition.
Haley Spades Yeah. Yeah. So I was like, all right, I'm going to live my life. I'm not going to let somebody stop me. You know, I was like, I'm young now. I'm like, I'm willing to take a risk because I don't know risk. If you take a risk, it's fine. And if it doesn't work out, you just go back.
Matt Slayer I tell people that should all the time.
Haley Spades People don't realize you can go back.
Matt Slayer I tell people I'm originally from Chicago, and those Chicago is a large fucking city is fucking stagnant. I left in 20, 11 and half. My friends are still in bars and restaurants are out when I fucking left and have no ambition of fucking change and good for them if they're fucking happy they're all in a period of pumped out 2.5 children.
Matt Slayer If they're.
Haley Spades Five.
Matt Slayer Averages. Yeah, if they're happy that's cool. It's just not for me.
Haley Spades Yeah.
Matt Slayer The idea of like, hey, I got into this world here so I'm going to stay here. Like now I tell people all the time, like, if you're not happy where you're at, change it. You can always go back. Don't suffer because your ancestors made a mistake.
Haley Spades Yeah, honestly. Yeah. Like, like if you decide to take a risk like I did coming to California, I knew in the back of my mind I was like, if for some reason this doesn't work out I can always go back. Like, it's not like I'm completely killed off from New Orleans. Like, I can't go back.
Matt Slayer They haven't banned you from the city.
Haley Spades Yeah, like, I can go back. I guess it's maybe an ego thing. Or people like, Oh, I don't want to admit that I failed, but, like, that's part of life. I feel like, you know, you take a risk. That's what it is. It's a risk. You don't know if it's going to work out or not, and you have to be okay with that.
Haley Spades You have to accept that and put your ego to the side. Honestly, that's what I did.
Matt Slayer Well, and you can always take a different risk. Like if LA, there's been points where it's like, fucking L.A. is expensive just during the pandemic, cause it's like, Fuck I am. I feel L is worth the price of admission normally, but I am paying for two years. Was up essentially paying for amusement park and sitting in the parking lot.
Haley Spades Yeah.
Matt Slayer And there were points where I considered like, do I really want to keep paying the cost of living to live here with everything there's parking going on. I don't want to go back to Chicago, though, and it's not because you don't build anything like that. I just don't know what the fuck I would do with myself.
Haley Spades Yeah, yeah. Like what would I do if I went back to New Orleans strip full time again? Cool. But I don't know. That's not. I mean, I like it. I like stripping. I go to Miami once a month now because the money's great. Well, it's a new place also. You know, like, I I'm not in New Orleans, so being in Miami is like a new experience for me.
Haley Spades I'm sure I'm going to get tired of it eventually, but I'm only there once a month. I think that kind of levels it out. But I was like going with you.
Matt Slayer Continuing to take risks.
Haley Spades Yeah, yeah, yeah. Like, like I said, I went to Miami. I took a risk. I took a risk going to Miami. 11 is a very hard club to get hired at. I was very scared because all four of the managers watch you audition and they all have to say yes. It's not a majority. All four have to be like yes.
Haley Spades And if you catch them in a bad mood on a bad day, you're done.
Matt Slayer That's an interesting process because you think if all four, all four of them are watching you at the same time, right?
Haley Spades Yep.
Matt Slayer Well, if one of them is really into you, he could try to influence his coworkers.
Haley Spades Yeah, yeah. I mean, I think that that's what happened with one of me. One of me. I think if you want to sit with one of them for me.
Matt Slayer He sending out clones to your strip.
Haley Spades Maybe one of the managers, though, like the the house dad told me he was like, yeah. One of them was like, man, but the rest of them were like, oh, come on, she's really cute. So there was a little bit persuasion there.
Matt Slayer If it was truly fair, they would audition you individually. And do it via a secret ballot.
Haley Spades Yeah. Because they, they did congregate like they all like. It's so wild, like you're on the stage, like, getting judged and then all four of them, like, congregate, and they're like. And you're like, it's just like judgment day here. Can I go to the restroom or like, wait.
Matt Slayer No, no. Yeah, go.
Haley Spades First. All right, I'm back.
Matt Slayer And Hill is.
Haley Spades Back. Yes, I am. Yes, it was like Judgment Day at 11 in Miami, so I'm really glad I was featured dancing. I don't have to worry about that. Right?
Matt Slayer They're paying you, and you don't have to audition for shit.
Haley Spades Yeah, yeah. And I don't have to worry about whether or not I'm going to make a certain amount of money. Like, I'm showing up for a certain rate which is amazing. I love that. Plus, I can make more. So a lot more. Yeah. Yeah. Like Mole. Yeah. I like the dances and everything. And so I'm like, I'm totally on board for that.
Matt Slayer Have you figured out costumes and all that shit and routines?
Haley Spades I'm still brainstorming a little bit because I am coming from being a classic club girl, but I want to kind of incorporate like, I think like Flo R and stuff like that, like from festivals, like raves and to my routines. I think I want to start with that and see how that goes. Those are costumes, definitely. I don't know, definitely not like Typical Stripper, where obviously I'm thinking about wearing most of my nice lingerie or I was even kind of contemplating some cosplay because I do cosplay, so I'm kind of contemplating that.
Haley Spades I haven't seen a lot of like feature dancers do that, but I'm like.
Matt Slayer Oh, there's definitely a couple. Um, fuck. I was attending in High seven years ago and they're doing the finals and everything, and one of the finalists definitely came out in the sexy part of your costume. Yeah, and I lost the mask, but the full fishnets, and it was like sexy predator. All right.
Haley Spades Yeah.
Matt Slayer It's weird.
Haley Spades Yeah.
Matt Slayer Got to make sure. Sexy Predator, not sex predator.
Haley Spades Yeah. Yes. Sexy, very attractive predator, right?
Matt Slayer Predator you'd like to fuck.
Haley Spades Yes. Not someone you're scared of, right?
Matt Slayer Well, maybe you're a little scared and aroused at the same time.
Haley Spades Yeah, that's normal. You could be scared and aroused, but you don't want to be.
Matt Slayer Some people are into that. You're. You're good.
Haley Spades Yeah, I could do one more. Thank you.
Matt Slayer You're welcome.
Haley Spades I love my claws.
Matt Slayer I don't have them on occasion.
Haley Spades Really.
Matt Slayer I'm much more of a whiskey drinker.
Haley Spades I believe, but I don't drink dark at all. The last time I drank dark liquor was at the swingers club I was during. You know, you want to know what got me is hurt. I had a daiquiri beforehand, which was already like, I have like, it was one 90 octane with an extra shot and has rum. And I believe I think it's I don't think it's dark rum because it's like a yellowy orange color.
Haley Spades I don't think it's dark.
Matt Slayer I think it's like a one 51 sometimes goes into those.
Haley Spades Yeah. But afterwards we had I, so I said one of my friends while we were at the swingers club to pick us up Crown Apple all with and we mix that with cranberry. You know what that tastes like? Tastes like a watermelon Jolly Rancher.
Matt Slayer That sounds.
Haley Spades Dangerous.
Matt Slayer Sounds dangerous. But also like, I don't know, I am not I am not in favor of whiskey testing anything besides whiskey.
Haley Spades Hey, I was 20 years old. I was all about the sweet drink.
Matt Slayer So that's understandable. Hell, a 20.
Haley Spades I drink an apple and cranberry that was a last time I drank crown and I chipped my tooth. That's why it's the last time.
Matt Slayer I know I'm not about flavored whiskey. No, no, no, no, no, no.
Haley Spades Yeah. I mean, hey, it wasn't that bad. I mean, he's a guy but me and my tooth, I got too wild on it. I was like, that is the last time I drink.
Matt Slayer Crowd Everyone's got to have, like, a brother. Like, I did really stupid shit here, and I just don't drink anymore.
Haley Spades I am a tequila girl, though. I love me some tequila. A lot of people have a problem with tequila, but I don't know.
Matt Slayer That you drink a blanco reposado.
Haley Spades Go. Yeah, I don't know. Tequila tequilas I go to. It doesn't give me crazy hangovers in my opinion. And I don't. I don't get too crazy on it.
Matt Slayer Well, that's a bad thing.
Haley Spades Is it? You think it's a bad thing? Maybe I need to switch it up. I don't.
Matt Slayer I don't have to babysit anymore, so I think it's a bad thing.
Haley Spades And vodka makes me cry.
Matt Slayer Oh, that's a bad.
Haley Spades That makes me cry out. Find something to cry about.
Haley Spades And so I had with tequila for the most part.
Matt Slayer What's your brand.
Haley Spades Don Julio? Classic. Typical. I do like casamigos. Casamigos is good. That's like, if they don't have Don Julio, I'm like, do you have casamigos? I would. I would rather casamigos. I'm a patron, but friends like rubbing alcohol to me all now. Well.
Matt Slayer Listen, says some shit like quavo.
Haley Spades Oh, Jose Caro now. Oh, so you're not.
Matt Slayer Like, why is your blanco yellow?
Haley Spades Yeah, well, literally, why is it yellow?
Matt Slayer It blanco clear yellow for some fuckin reason.
Haley Spades Yeah. Don Julio, Silver Blanco, whatever it's called. That's my go to. I could drink that straight. Like, no problem. I don't know.
Matt Slayer When a good tequila should know that is going straight.
Haley Spades Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's my favorite. I used to keep a big ole jug of it in my fridge before I decided to, like, tone it down with the drinking because I'm like, I'm, like, super into fitness right now, you know? And it's like, I'll have a couple of drinks every once in a while. I'm going to Miami, and I'm going to be drinking a lot, but I try to keep it, you know, I'm not drinking like I was in New Orleans.
Haley Spades You know, I try to keep it at bay. Especially like I'm all about the games now, right?
Matt Slayer For the audience. Audience. She's got some guns on her.
Haley Spades I'm about the games nowadays, so alcohol inhibits that.
Matt Slayer I know. I'm painfully aware.
Haley Spades So I yeah, it's all about balance. So that's why I'm like this weekend I out of Miami and be drinking. I mean, because for me working in the strip club, I associate it with drinking. That's probably not a good thing. But hey, we all have our vices and I associate drinking with the strip club. And you know what?
Haley Spades I make more money when I drink. Oh yeah.
Matt Slayer I'm sure it loosens you up a bit.
Haley Spades I'm like, I get more aggressive.
Matt Slayer So how do you approach dudes in the club?
Haley Spades But I don't even remember how it went last time I was in Miami, but in New Orleans, I would kind of like, pull off like Prissy Princess, a bitchy vibe, like, Oh, you don't want to give me money. Fine, buy and half the time they would come back to me. It was like, you know, you play hard to get kind of you play like you play like they can't afford you.
Haley Spades And then they're like, But I want her so they come back.
Matt Slayer How do you identify the dude? You're just like.
Haley Spades I just go to anybody. Honestly, if they if they make eye contact with me, I'll just go up to them. I try and play nice. I'm like, I really do. Like, I'm like, Hi, I like, what's your name? Blah, blah, blah, blah. But if they start giving me, like, pushback, I'm like, or if they like or if they like gawk at, like, my lap dance price, I'm like, Okay, fine, somebody else, I'll pay it.
Haley Spades And I say that and I'm like, have a good night. And then I walk away. Half the time they do come back and they come find me later on the last time, I think in Miami, I'm trying. Remember how that went? I got a little turnt and I was sleep deprived, so didn't help. So my memory is a little dragged there, but I remember I went on stage.
Haley Spades I had some oh, it was some somebody's bachelor party and he was so obsessed with me. Oh, and I. I joined a table, this guy, like I had a stack of ones he was like, Do you want to come to my table? And I was like, yeah. So I went over there and they were actually really nice. I don't have to pull the bitch card.
Haley Spades I was very nice. I just shook my ass a little bit. Made like a grande offer them, you know, just from being at their table. And it's so funny because the guy I was dancing on, he found me on Instagram and like, he, like, messaged me and he was like, Hey, let me know what your Venmo is. If I owe you any more money, that's Miami for you.
Matt Slayer You're like, $10,000 please.
Haley Spades I was like, I was like, I was like, if you want to send me more money, that's cool. But he thought that I didn't get the money that, like, they had spent because they were just throwing it on the ground. And I had went to the restroom and I came back and the girls were like picking it all up and leaving.
Haley Spades So, like, we counted it all out. But in his mind, he was like, oh, my God, she went to the bathroom. She didn't get all that money. And he handed me more money later in the night. Like I was with another customer. And I remember him handing me like a stack, like $100, like, you know, Band-Aid with the hundred dollar paper around it.
Haley Spades He was like, This is where you you know, that's how Miami is. So I think for the most part, I mean, mostly money off of that table. And then the guy that I was with afterwards, it was his bachelor party and he just kept giving me money That's how it is. Miami is crazy.
Matt Slayer As I said, my very first club experience was in Miami, a club called Stir Crazy.
Haley Spades Never heard of it. I don't know.
Matt Slayer I don't even know if it is still exist.
Haley Spades Probably not.
Matt Slayer This is fucking like 2001.
Haley Spades That was me. Four 11.
Matt Slayer I want to see if this place still exists. Like, I'm going to Google it real quick.
Haley Spades Yeah.
Matt Slayer Oh, I'll search it. It's still exist.
Haley Spades Oh, God.
Matt Slayer Stir crazy. Showgirls. One, two, 425. South Dixie Highway. Miami, Florida.
Haley Spades Oh, my God. I'm an 11 girl. Sorry.
Matt Slayer I'm not. I don't have any brand loyalty to the place. I was just. Yeah, but the place was wild because, like, my own strip, I had never actually been in a strip club before. And, you know, popular culture is like, you know, if you touch a girl you're going to get your hands broken. And I'm there with my boss and my boss's boss at the time.
Matt Slayer We were there on business trip. I'm 22. Suddenly me into a club under age and still not get a dance. Okay.
Haley Spades I guess I'll be here. Pressure.
Matt Slayer I got to dance and, like, I'm just, like, hands on my side. Like, I'm not getting my ass it.
Haley Spades You're talking about, like, I'm underage.
Matt Slayer I'm not getting no fucking any trouble. And the dancers, like, you know, you can touch me.
Haley Spades It's literally me. Sometimes I'm like, you can, like, loosen up.
Matt Slayer Well, I guess, like, in this club, like, the the dancers were encouraged to grab their test and shot like that. Yeah. And it's just like, that's only a Miami club to me.
Haley Spades That's the Miami.
Matt Slayer Thing. Yeah. You go to other clubs around the country, like, you grab a girl's tits, like you're about to get 86 and probably it is just hard. Mhm. But it was just like, oh you want me to grow to. Oh, okay. Look, okay.
Haley Spades Miami's a little more wild, but I don't mind, you know, like, I don't know, I don't mind it but it gets a boundary is, you know, like, like I always thought my thing is in the strip clubs I'm like you can touch everywhere. Like if you're, if you're paying me know.
Matt Slayer Obviously if you're.
Haley Spades Paying me you can touch anywhere besides below the waist you know, like, I mean you touch my butt but you know, like I always say don't try to penetrate my door pet the kiddy that's what I say. And like you could touch everything else. Don't pat the kiddy and they're very they're very happy. They're like, all right, cool, cool.
Haley Spades You know, that's Miami, though.
Matt Slayer My scumbag boss definitely tried to fingerprinted it all like.
Haley Spades Oh, no, that's how you get. I think people forget that we were heels. I have not been afraid to take my heel to some man's crotch. All right, you try and you try and do me dirty. I'm going to do you even dirty or I'm. I hurt you.
Matt Slayer Well, as a 20 year old dude, you know, I had a scared. Oh, I was a little scared. But I also had a lot I'm like, oh, my God, I can't believe I'm like, as a dude who now works in sex, the sexual, you know, adjacent and running, like, man, he was a giant fucking scumbag.
Haley Spades Yeah. Yeah.
Matt Slayer What are you. What are you doing, dude?
Haley Spades Yeah.
Matt Slayer Don't try to finger being strangers at all.
Haley Spades Oh, my God. Like, I always I always like question people who are, like, that. I'm like, first time. Why do you want a finger, baby? Why do you want to touch up? I always my favorite thing one of my favorite things is how people who are very, very, like, grabby like that. I'm like, what if I let every customer before you do that exact same thing, and then they get disgusted, and they're like, oh, my God, what if that's it?
Haley Spades They're being like, So that's it. And that's what I pull out. I pull out the guns. I'm like, Oh, I'm about to make you feel gross.
Matt Slayer But the funny thing is, in reality, that shit doesn't matter. Like, who cares? Like, how many people have been inside you in the grand scheme of.
Haley Spades Things, but like, in the moment, like, when they realize, like, Oh my God, what if she was, like, doing that with the guy before me just now? It's like, it's like a male ego thing in the club session or whatever. They're under the influence. They're like cellulite is a little gross.
Matt Slayer Yeah. Because the same kind of do that wants to just try to bring her back. Someone is the same guy to do that will be turned off by that shit.
Haley Spades Yeah.
Matt Slayer My favorite story about the shit like that is one of my buddies, former guest of the show used to be a strip club deejay, and he was dating the dancer and then went and hooked up in the parking lot and he finished on her chest.
Haley Spades Like she go back to work.
Matt Slayer She went back to work and like kind of like just patted herself down. And her very next customer, like, was trying to suck on her tits and she just let him. Yeah.
Haley Spades Yeah. It's kind of like a fuck you. Yeah.
Matt Slayer It's like takes my boyfriend's load literally. Now that that's a different thing.
Haley Spades That's funny. No, no, I like that kind of show. That's funny. That's like, it looks like a fuck you, but, like, you don't know if a fuck you kind of thing. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Matt Slayer They're just salty because a sweat.
Haley Spades Yeah. Oh. Huh? Well.
Matt Slayer Yeah, my, my crow. Who told the story on here is just like, yep, yep. That's why I don't mess around with strippers in the club at all.
Haley Spades Yeah. You never know.
Matt Slayer You never know.
Haley Spades Especially in Miami. Oh, my God, that's crazy. Oh, yeah. I'm excited to go back because I know when I go dance, they're the people. The people that visit Miami, and they have money. They have money just to burn. Basically, it's crazy. It's people spending $100,000 a night on tables and bottles.
Matt Slayer Which is so weird to me.
Haley Spades I know. I honestly, I'm like, Hey, I'm here to read the benefit, but I'm like, Where did you get all that money? Thank you. A lot of strippers, they think Vegas is the destination. But honestly, I think Miami is the destination. I've worked in Vegas. That's all right. Doesn't compare to Miami for me.
Matt Slayer I suppose I'm fucking Vegas. No, I absolutely fucking hate them because they're generally overpopulated with dancers.
Haley Spades Too many, like 200. 200 girls? Yeah.
Matt Slayer It's so overpopulated. Dancers don't. Unfortunately, for dancers to make their their fucking nut, they're just got to be like, Yo, want to dance?
Haley Spades And I hate that.
Matt Slayer Yeah. Like, there's. There's no role play there's.
Haley Spades There's no height, right?
Matt Slayer Because as a dude or as a dude, I don't even want to be in a strip club. I've worked in them too much to actually enjoy them anymore. Yeah, but back when I actually enjoyed strip clubs, I'm paying for the fantasy that you actually, like, want to put up with my bullshit. Not that you just want to have a transactional like I'm consciously aware this is a transactional nature, but I want to pretend.
Haley Spades And you want to forget that it.
Matt Slayer Is right. I want to forget, and I want to pretend that, like, you're actually into my bullshit and like, this is where you want to be. Like, not, hey, you want to dance? Nah, I'm cool. Well, fuck you that I want.
Haley Spades That's the Vegas.
Matt Slayer Hustle. Yeah, that is the.
Haley Spades Biggest line up at the door. I don't like that. I remember at work that spearmint rhino probably never gonna work there ever again, so I don't feel bad shaming them. But they would say, like, whenever I get hired, they're like, oh, whenever we have a big group of guys coming in, we will tell the dancers to line up at the door.
Haley Spades And you know what? Half the time, those guys don't like that, and I know that, but that's what all the girls do. So you kind of feel inclined to do it. And I'm like, I'm going to go to Miami, where there's a ton of people maybe 100 girls. That's still a lot of girls, but there's so many people in Miami.
Haley Spades Like, there's plenty of money to go around. So I don't know, it's it's more of like like in Miami, it's like a party. Well, at least at 11, it's a party. Like you're at a nightclub where there just happens to be strippers. And you know what? It works out. It's a good it's a good business model. Whereas and I don't know, Vegas, it's not really the nightclub vibe.
Haley Spades Like you're just going for the strip club.
Matt Slayer 100% is. And you. Yeah. Yeah. I've been dragged to multiple Vegas strip clubs for work like they're at the future or there because one of my friends is dancing like that. It's just like I hate I'm like I'm up front with girls is there's like, hey, I'm here with the future. I'm here working. I'm not going to get dance.
Matt Slayer And nine times just kind of met with a fuck you. It's like, you know, I'm just being a part, but it's also like I'm being asked to do that. I'm not going to waste your time. I'm not going to have you sit here for a minute and try to hustle and be like, Don cool.
Haley Spades Yeah.
Matt Slayer And then every once in a while you get like one girl who's just like, I just want to go off my feet from it. You mind if I fucking bottle rat? Yeah. Ever say bottle wrap it? Like, Can I grab a drink off the bottle? Yeah.
Haley Spades So that's my favorite thing. That's kind of one of my ways. I, like, weasel my way into a table, my kind of drink my how are you? Thanks to the drink, you know.
Matt Slayer And I've had, you know, girls do you know, just just chill the table, have a couple of drinks. I'm like, that's cool. If you understand, like, I'm not buying, but you want to chill and get off your feet for a minute. That's that's on you. That's cool.
Haley Spades Yeah, yeah, yeah. I'm excited, though, to feature and, like, not have to worry about so much of the hustle. Like, I love the hustle. Like, I know 11 doesn't do feature dancing. Great. Love that. I want to have, like, my grounding moment where I'm like, I'm a stripper and not a feature I like closer I came from. That's my roots.
Haley Spades You know, there's something about being a stripper that I do enjoy to this day. I do. I love it. I don't know, just something about it, you know? So I'm excited to have 11 as like my main stripping point right now and then having featuring around the country. The other thing because I have traveled around the country, I've worked, I've worked in Chicago worked at Scores and I worked.
Matt Slayer At Fucking Stone Park. Oh, God, fucking scores.
Haley Spades Were you were in dress. I hated it. Oh my God. I don't even think I did that. Good there. Honestly, I only worked one night and then I worked. Oh, my God.
Matt Slayer You weren't the admiral or not admiral.
Haley Spades I think I worked at Ricks, sir. I think it's like in the suburbs of Chicago's wild, like, all the clubs weren't really in Chicago.
Matt Slayer There are only three clubs in Chicago proper. Yeah, which is the admiral, the ping pong and I forget the last one, and at least with the admiral is former. No alcohol. And I've never actually been in banking to the other one, but the other ones are like, on the club three 90. I don't know if it still exists.
Haley Spades It does, but I haven't worked there. I know it exists.
Matt Slayer That place has a phenomenal kitchen.
Haley Spades Hey, so strip clubs get some good frickin food. Penthouse Club in Tampa. Those cheese fries. I would. I would go up to customers all the time. I'm like, You want to buy me a drink? And some cheese around I mean, my friend was what I remember. I'm like, Ah, that was a great that was a great time. But yeah, I've actually worked in New York and I've worked in Chicago.
Haley Spades I've worked in Vegas, I worked in Dallas. I've worked in Houston. I've worked in Tampa, Miami, New Orleans. Where else have I? Fricking what? Panama City Beach. All right. I was actually a gold mine I worked a little bit in California. I don't recommend it. I'm still trying out San Diego, which is like the spot for dancing LA Socks.
Matt Slayer California has I.
Haley Spades I mean, California sucks in general.
Matt Slayer California has weird laws when it comes to it. It's just it's weird.
Haley Spades I mean, it's not worth it might be on a certain night, but for the most part, like, I wouldn't travel to California with the intention.
Matt Slayer Of, oh, god, I'm sorry.
Haley Spades No, I've never I've never I don't know, anytime any time any of my friends from out of state are like, how are the clubs in California? I'm like, don't waste your time. I'm like, I'm only dancing on and off because I live here. I like it's just it's here. I'm like, I might as well, but I would not travel to California.
Matt Slayer No, it's weird. Laws and the clubs are fucking weird. I've worked in a bunch of them, and it's it's like some of them are like, Oh, hey, no, no, the alcohol. So I'm like, no nudity.
Haley Spades At all. Not even topless. Like, if you're, if you're even topless.
Matt Slayer Because technically, by California law, you're not allowed to have nudity in serve alcohol. If the stage was in within like 50 feet of the audience. Yep. Which there are definitely some clubs in L.A. that really skirt that line.
Haley Spades Yeah.
Matt Slayer There's one club that employed me at points where it's like, Oh, there's definitely two here and there. Definitely not a bar. What they had at one point was like a full wall, like with a door for the bar that was in the same building, but a bit like, yeah, and let top down the divider wall. It's like, how are you guys operating legally?
Matt Slayer I mean, I don't care. You're paying me.
Haley Spades But yeah, yeah, it's crazy. It's crazy, it's boring. It is not. I mean, I like I said, I only dance every so often because I'm here. I might as well I might as well see what I can make, you know, as like an experiment, but it's not my main income. Like, if I want dancing to be my main income, I'm going to go to Miami, New Orleans, hell, even Vegas, if I if I really wanted to adopt the Vegas hustle, I could.
Haley Spades But I don't want to fuck that.
Matt Slayer I don't know.
Haley Spades I don't want to. I rather go somewhere else, you know?
Matt Slayer Are you looking eventually to like do enough, you know, work in porn where you don't have to dance as much and just do the patron or.
Haley Spades Yeah, that's like that's kind of what I want to do. That's why I wanted to get an A featuring because like I said, I love dancing. And featuring is it's like I want to be in that limelight. You know, I want to be the center of attention. I want to be like, yes, Haley Spades is coming to your club.
Haley Spades You better come and see me because this is the only chance you're going to be able to see me in public and meet me and all this other stuff, you know? And it's also a really good business opportunity because I can like sell my merch and, you know, sell my dances and stuff like that and meet my fans.
Haley Spades And I like that versus like whereas I go into like a normal strip club, I'm just another girl.
Matt Slayer I'm going to pitch a concept to you that I don't think anyone else is doing. You should make thumb drives of your only content and bring it with you on the road.
Haley Spades You're saying.
Matt Slayer Why not?
Haley Spades I'll be like, here, you can buy this USP of all of my videos. Yeah, why not for an X amount of dollars? Why not? You get to keep it forever.
Matt Slayer They're already there to see you. Why not?
Haley Spades Yeah. No, that's a good idea. I might do that. I might have to have my assistant do that, though. That's a lot of work. That's a good idea. So, like, I still I still do like the, like I said, the dancing aspect. So I think Miami, like, my club in Miami, 11 is going to be like my home base if I want to have like that.
Haley Spades I'm just a normal girl stripping. I do like to tell people, though, that I am the porn star. Haley Spades.
Matt Slayer Okay, so you're not adopting a different name while you're in Miami?
Haley Spades No, no, no. I always dance by Haley. You know, I don't I don't like to switch that up. And if I have to, I'm like, oh, right. Because my old stripper name was Aubrey, you know, which I could do Aubrey or Jordan. Those are my stripper names. I can do that. But it feels very boring.
Matt Slayer Well, it's.
Haley Spades Also Haley Spades.
Matt Slayer Brandon Brandon's fucking.
Haley Spades Important. Yeah, it was so funny because I went back to New Orleans two months ago, and the house mom, I was like, Hey, I want to dance by Haley, like Haley Spades. And she was like, Oh, we already have a Haley here. And I was like, I like, you know who I am. I'm like, Do you know what y'all know?
Haley Spades Do you know what I've been doing for the past year? So you know what I know? So I went and talked to the manager, and he was like, Yeah, you could dance by Haley because he understood, like, I've shot for Penthouse, like I've shot for the Penthouse porn company. I deserve to dance by my name. Haley say it.
Matt Slayer Was up on the dish. Really? And Haley Spades comes to the stage. Not just.
Haley Spades Haley. Yeah, exactly, exactly. It's a little bit tricky. Some of the clubs will do that. Some of them just say, Haley, I'm happy, which is Haley. You can call me Haley. It's fine, but I think in Miami, I do dance by Haley. Yes, I do. Yeah, I was like, wait. I was like, wait. It's been a month. I do dance by Haley at 11.
Haley Spades They had they had somebody in the system as Haley, but she had been there in like eight months and their.
Matt Slayer Contract is over.
Haley Spades You can have it there like you can have it. I was like, had to mine. Besides, like, they don't really call your name over like, like, you know how some strip clubs up like.
Matt Slayer Haley is an immensely Haley the mainstay they.
Haley Spades Don't do that at 11 so it's not really a big deal of multiple girls of the same name.
Matt Slayer Next up is Haley.
Haley Spades They don't do that. Thank God. I wish I mean, sometimes like it would make my heart flutter when I really did that. Like, oh my God. Like whenever I feature dance party. No, they're gonna be like, all right. And now I have Haley stage our feature. I'm like, I remember being in Tampa and Alexis, Texas, I think featured at Dollhouse in Tampa.
Haley Spades And I remember seeing her. I think it was hers is like three years ago Stormy Daniels in New Orleans. I mean, she's from Louisiana, so it's a given. I actually have a picture with her because she showed up to New Orleans as a customer a year ago. I have a picture of me and her. She was just sitting in VIP and I was like kind of extruded I told her.
Haley Spades I was like, I just joined the porn industry and I needed a picture with you. I still have it. That's so funny. I forgot about that.
Matt Slayer Got her. No.
Haley Spades No.
Matt Slayer You know, she directs it.
Haley Spades Should I know? She I told her I was going to do I was like new. I was like, this was in April. This is a year ago of last year. So I was only in the industry for two months of that point. So I was a little shy. I was like, I'm new. Yeah.
Matt Slayer Stories an award winning director for Wicked.
Haley Spades My God. And know that. Yeah. Stormy Daniels. I heard she's like, performing again.
Matt Slayer I don't know.
Haley Spades Maybe I heard that somewhere.
Matt Slayer I mean, she's been directing for years now.
Haley Spades Yeah. Oh, my God. But I remember her featuring at the Penthouse Club in New Orleans. Who else featured? And I remember those are the two I remember Alexis, Texas and Stormy Daniels. Those are the two I remember. And I remember watching them, and I was like, man, I was a little bit jealous because I would see all the money on the stage at the time.
Haley Spades I was like, They already make so much money.
Matt Slayer Well, and that's something that you're going to have to deal with. How still just.
Haley Spades Oh, they're gonna hate me. Fucking hated them. I didn't hate Stormy Daniels, but I hated, like, you know, like at the Dollhouse and Tampa, especially when I was having a bad night, and I would see these feature girls come in, I would get a little jealous. I'd be like, I deserve that.
Matt Slayer I definitely had to stop one of my clients from fighting a house girl while we were on the.
Haley Spades Oh, the girls can get me.
Matt Slayer The house girl was talking shit about the my client's fucking choice in music. Should she dance to my fucking song? And my client was someone who's just not about taking shit.
Haley Spades Yeah.
Matt Slayer And we were in the manager's office, which was working as the dressing room, and she just comes storming out of the fucking door, bitch. I could fucking hear you. I'm like, Yeah, we need to go back in the office now.
Haley Spades You're being paid to be here. Do not fuck this.
Matt Slayer You're being paid. I mean, because you're getting criticism. Put it back inside. Back inside. Then, like I still did over the fucking time fully. Thankfully, I was running the band. Sort of like the band from that. She was dancer from the song she does because at first, you know, a lot of hurdles. Just like the pictures I saw, I thought she was a fucking poser, but her fucking road is wearing like, the shirt, like.
Haley Spades Her fucking roadie.
Matt Slayer Oh, yeah. We're both fucking metal heads, like.
Haley Spades Yeah, yeah, yes.
Matt Slayer I'm wearing a Megadeth shirt. Yeah, she is dancing to Megadeth because we're fucking metalheads. Like, this is legit. Yeah, she did not come here to steal your song. Random Anonymous House Girl.
Haley Spades Came here to perform and live.
Matt Slayer Right?
Haley Spades She's not here working every night.
Matt Slayer Right? She is not in Philadelphia every fucking night.
Haley Spades Yeah, well, yeah, I already know. I already know what's going to happen, cause I was one of those girls, you know? I was like, I'll admit it. It's so funny because we're all. Stormy Daniels is on stage at the Penthouse Club in New Orleans. It was very Halloween, and it was an open bar. Like, you know, like it was like one of those nights.
Haley Spades It like, I expect, like, I'm not going to make that much money, but I get to dress up and drink with my friends. Like, you know, it's like I knew I wasn't going to make, like, a shit ton of money that night, especially when there's open bar. Hello, duh.
Matt Slayer But do you think you should? Because they're spending less money on alcohol.
Haley Spades So the people that are, like, cheap.
Matt Slayer Yeah. So for open bar.
Haley Spades On open bar. Yeah. So I remember standing there watching Stormy Daniels you know, just minding my business, and this customer turns around. I love Stormy Daniels. All right? I have nothing against her. Let me just make that clear. This customer turns around, and he was like, Why aren't you up there? You should be out there, not her. And I was like, Oh, flatter me.
Haley Spades She could tip me. I'm right in front of you. You could buy a dance, right? Then go do something. You don't need to look at me on stage. He bought a dance, you know, like, I just like I remember stuff like that, and I'm like, man, I'm out to be that girl on stage, which I'm so excited for.
Haley Spades Actually, I'm so fricking like I said, it's always been a dream of mine to, like, take that next step, especially, like, my dancing career. So just says, I'm so comfortable with being on a stage like that. I but I know, I know the house girls are gonna hate me. They're going to hate me. That's why. That's why they keep the feature away from the house girls.
Matt Slayer Oh, I know. Oh, I know.
Haley Spades The house girls will get me.
Matt Slayer Oh, I know that that's. I've been a roadie for a long time. Oh, I mean, it's been years, so it's been years since I've done the gig, but I have done the gig a lot of times. Like, you know, there were multiple times where it was my job to run interference between the house girls and how skillz management and the.
Haley Spades Is that what I'm going to happen? I'm going to have a roadie. In a sense.
Matt Slayer I you should hire one.
Haley Spades Like, Oh, I should hire one. I know. I know my contract for my upcoming feature. It says that security will be provided by Sapphire, by the club that I'm featuring. I don't know when you're released in. I want a couple of weeks. Yeah. They might be out by then. If it is, you could put it in there eventually.
Matt Slayer When you get to another level, there'll be a budget for a roadie on.
Haley Spades Yeah, I know the contract for my club that I'm featuring at in May. They says that security will be provided by the club. So which I've actually, I've actually worked at that club before as a dancer so nice. Yeah. Not, not the specific location, but one of the locations in the city I've worked at and it was an interesting experience so I'm excited to be there as a feature.
Matt Slayer Well, hopefully to the point where you can start in your own roadie because club providing security is one thing, but it's also better to have like someone you know and trust me, like, oh, I'm scooping dollars for you. I'm making sure from when we leave the club, get back to the hotel, do any extracurricular activities you got someone with you.
Haley Spades Unfortunately, I don't really have that right now. I am a single Pringle, and I would have to hire somebody. I would have, oh, no.
Matt Slayer You got to hire somebody. The people who contract you, I'm not going to say which network is this? Yeah, don't the super do not allow significant others.
Haley Spades Oh, yeah. No, yeah. I mean, that's understandable because then, like, emotions get involved, right? Then it's like stay out of this right now.
Matt Slayer You want, you want someone with you who's like, there is a professional. Yeah. So Scoop, you know. Yeah. Deal with management. Like no, she wants this is her playlist like pretty much when you get to the point the roadie like. Yeah. So I would yeah. I'd carry the bags. Make sure like make sure all arrangements. Yeah. Like I would talk to the DG, here's her setlist.
Matt Slayer This is what you need to play. This is how you announcer these are her credits. Yeah. That's all part of the gig.
Haley Spades Yeah.
Matt Slayer And all you do is chill backstage, eat, put, decide on your outfits and go perform.
Haley Spades Yeah, that's a.
Matt Slayer And there are definitely nights where like my client didn't feel like drinking and I had to fucking drink for basically.
Haley Spades I was a do they give you free drinks or.
Matt Slayer Not? I was like some VIP like the, the the is like, that's like one of our big Spencer spenders. Like, can you give him some attention?
Haley Spades Yeah.
Matt Slayer So like, I rolled over there with her and he's just like, oh, I got bottle service. I want to buy your shots. And she's kind of like, Matt, I'm a client.
Haley Spades Yeah.
Matt Slayer What's up.
Haley Spades Man? Yeah, yeah.
Matt Slayer Help curate the.
Haley Spades Party. Like to drink? I do. I like to drink, so. Oh, she.
Matt Slayer Likes to drink, too. It's just one of those. Like, she's.
Haley Spades Like she doesn't want.
Matt Slayer To. She didn't want to. I'm like.
Haley Spades Yeah.
Matt Slayer That's a garbage disposal for alcohol. Here you go. Do it.
Haley Spades Yeah.
Matt Slayer I like coffee patrol, and I'm just like, I just drink this all night. This is.
Haley Spades Pretty.
Matt Slayer Grown. It's a it was a thing that I don't even know.
Haley Spades Oh, I love a nice espresso martini, but coffee patron.
Matt Slayer Yeah, this will make it. Holy fuck. That's a $200 bottle.
Haley Spades Oh, my God. Oh, here. One of my fans that I'd buy that one of my feature club. So, my God.
Matt Slayer Well, depending on okay it's it's for sale between $199 a bottle. I don't know why there's such a.
Haley Spades Wide bay window.
Matt Slayer Yeah. What such a wild window? I'm. But yeah, it's Petron excited cafe.
Haley Spades Interesting.
Matt Slayer I'm like, this is low proof. I can drink this all fucking night.
Haley Spades Yeah, I'm excited and I'm excited to feature. Oh, my God. I've already already started brainstorming. Like I said, I want to incorporate some, like, flow and, like, led like, stuff into my shows. But that's about all I have that I want to share for now.
Matt Slayer While you were saying you want.
Haley Spades To cosplay, well.
Matt Slayer What do you want? What do you think about cosplay in?
Haley Spades Oh, man, I have I have a tried and true cosplay that I really like doing, but I don't know, I'm like, I'm kind of torn between new and cosplay because that takes away from who I am. Like as a performer. Like people know me as the short, petite blond Hayley Spade's barrel on a wig and stuff and it's like it's not really Hayley Spades, but my, that's my issue with it because like I but like I love cosplaying 02 from Darling in the Franks the anime.
Haley Spades I love that. I don't know. They love, I love, I love that cosplay. And I like I know I like being like a little cat girl to the cat girl I've cosplay to Shiro. Hmm. No game, no life, you know, from Naruto and it's like stuff like that. But I'm like, I don't know how big of a crown.
Haley Spades I don't know I.
Matt Slayer Think their second performance of the night.
Haley Spades Yeah. Oh, yeah. Because I do have to some nights, so it makes sense. Maybe I'm like, okay, the first performance is me is Hayley Spades. And the second performance I am doing a cosplay. Oh, so that's a lot of work, though. I mean, by.
Matt Slayer Welcome to being a feature. I know I'm.
Haley Spades Like, I have time, but like, getting in the cosplay can sometimes take hours, so it's like, I'd have to, like, kind of like consolidate that in a sense.
Matt Slayer Maybe do something that's not so makeup heavy.
Haley Spades Yeah, well, it's just like having to, like, put on a wig the right way, you know, like doing your hair and like having it, like, secured the right way.
Matt Slayer And some measures. Officer Yeah.
Haley Spades I'm like, I don't know if I want to do all that. So I'm still brainstorming with that cosplay is definitely on my list of things to possibly explore, but I definitely want to incorporate like the flow art kind of thing with LED is. Yeah. Oh man. One Stormy Daniels came to the penthouse club and oil show clubs are 50 50 on that.
Haley Spades Some of them like it that if you put a tarp down.
Matt Slayer Oh, you have to put.
Haley Spades Yeah. Otherwise all of them are like, No, Stormy Daniels like put down a whole tarp and did Oil Show. So like I could do stuff like that.
Matt Slayer That's, I mean, they're also because of how famous Stormy is at this point, they're like, they're not going to.
Haley Spades Order you.
Matt Slayer On. Right. But I can argue with Stormy.
Haley Spades Yeah. Yeah, I know. Some clubs are like, no, like my first feature, they were like, absolutely no oil, no silly string but I was like, no confetti. Like, anything that I have to clean up, don't bring it here. So they say basically and okay, so I'm going to keep it simple. Probably. Yeah. I mean, the first club I'm like I said, I'm featuring it.
Haley Spades I've worked there before as a dancer. Only one night. Very interesting club.
Matt Slayer But is that the one full of Wall Street pros?
Haley Spades It is, but. But they have three different locations in New York, and I haven't worked at the specific location. It's their newest one.
Matt Slayer Oh, okay. I've been to one of the older ones where one of my friends is Fisher. I was just there hanging out.
Haley Spades Yeah.
Matt Slayer And it was just like everyone has suspenders. On. This is so weird.
Haley Spades Wall Street. Rose, I like them. Hey, I like their money.
Matt Slayer Yeah. I don't.
Haley Spades Know. I like, um, I like. And New York has a very big they get. They got a big population of men with money.
Matt Slayer Yeah. It's a really fucking expensive place.
Haley Spades On a strip club, so I have nothing against them. So I'm interested to see how it goes. Is a feature as a dancer is a little bit intimidating, a little bit a of it. I bet all of it, especially as I first I only lasted one night there. And it's funny my my ex-boyfriend, he went there as a customer while I was there and was like, he was just talking to the girls to try and get a feel for the club.
Haley Spades He was like, I want to see what's happening that you don't know about. I mean, he didn't really find out much. He was just like drinking. Yeah. Too drunk. It ended up going back to the hotel early, like.
Matt Slayer Well, so what house girl's going to tell some random fucking the secret?
Haley Spades Yeah. Yeah. I was like, I was like, Okay, good. Go back to the hotel. Let me make my money because I always felt weird. I don't know. I never wanted him to be there, but in New York, he was like, I want to come and check out these New York clubs of you. And I was like, Fine, just don't tell anybody.
Haley Spades He's my ex-boyfriend. So I'm like, now I'm like, I don't care what he does. But at a time, like, he, he was just like, I've never been to a New York strip club. He's like, I've heard all kinds of things. I want to know what these girls offer and do and stuff like that. And I was like, Okay.
Haley Spades But then he got too drunk and had to go home to the hotel room. Oh.
Matt Slayer Poor baby got too drunk.
Haley Spades That was him. I used to babysit him all time. He's an ex for a reason.
Matt Slayer Well, it's not just because of New Orleans, apparently. Oh, no.
Haley Spades There was a lot of issues with that relationship. That's why is an ex. I haven't talked to him in like a year, so it's good.
Matt Slayer Yeah, it's good that you're staying strong and like, fuck that. It's been a trying time for everybody where like.
Haley Spades Now.
Matt Slayer I remember there were some good times.
Haley Spades And one.
Matt Slayer Good on. Yeah, good on, good.
Haley Spades How good on that? I like. I like living my own life.
Matt Slayer Well, you should. And like, a good partner shouldn't be in pain in your life.
Haley Spades Yeah, no, that's that's a good point. You know, like, if there is somebody trying to change you or change your path, they're not meant to be in your life.
Matt Slayer When I especially when it comes to like working in sex work, if you have someone who like, remotely objects to what you're doing, especially if you are a sex worker, when they met you yeah. That's how fucking read pleasure. A giant fucking problem. Yep. And is the tail that tells all the time in fucking porn of girls meet some dude who's like all about it until it's time for them to go to set and then all of a sudden the captains say about how and they're like, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no.
Matt Slayer I don't want, I don't feel right. And like, all of a sudden they're a girl. Girl performer.
Haley Spades Oh, my God, I can't text you while you're on set. Stuff like that.
Matt Slayer Yeah. Guess what, if I was working retail, you couldn't text me either, motherfucker.
Haley Spades You fucking people. Yeah, no, I'm good. I'm good. I'm enjoying my single life. Like I said, I'll wait and see if the right person comes in. But at this time in my life, I'm just trying to do what I want to do.
Matt Slayer As you should.
Haley Spades As you fucking should. Let me live my life.
Matt Slayer In your fucking early twenties.
Haley Spades Yeah. If somebody rolls around and they're completely okay with it, good on me, hopefully. Oh, yeah. You never know. I mean, let's switch gears very quickly.
Matt Slayer I mean, that's why a lot of people end up dead in within the industry. Because, yeah, I.
Haley Spades Don't know, I kind of have a problem with that. I know there's some good apples. I know there's a lot of bad apples. And my thing is, if I'm dating somebody in the industry, are we ever going to not talk about work? Are we ever going to talk about anything besides work? Anything besides what we do? I'm like, What are your hobbies?
Haley Spades What do you do for fun? You know what? What are your interests outside of porn and shooting you know, like, I want to have I want to have a separation.
Matt Slayer That's so fucking important. Yeah.
Haley Spades And I feel like a lot of people in the industry, I don't know these relationships, but talking to some of these people that I work with, hey, I love everybody I work with. You guys are great. But some people don't have hobbies.
Matt Slayer And unfortunately, because the nature of the beast of this thing, most people have a limited window in this fucking industry.
Haley Spades Yeah.
Matt Slayer So a lot of people are trying to make their money as fast and as hard as they can. Yeah. And don't have the energy to concentrate on anything fucking else. And I can tell you firsthand that someone who does this and tries not to just talk about, you know, what you're doing in the industry. I get performers on here then unfortunately have nothing to fuckin say if we're not talking directly about their fucking.
Haley Spades I'm like, I'm like, I love dancing I like surfing, I like video games, I like cosplay. I work out like, you know, you're like, I'm smiling. I like traveling for fun, you know, like I have hobbies I like, you know.
Matt Slayer Where else have you been, by the way?
Haley Spades Traveling. Well, Mexico's the first international trip I'm taking. I know. Well, I got my passport right before the pandemic. And at the time, I was about to graduate college, so it was 20. 20. Right. I'm good. Thanks. I have this.
Matt Slayer One.
Haley Spades Yes, it is. I was about to graduate college. It's 20. 20. Right. So when the world shut down. Okay. Yeah, so I was about to graduate literally two weeks before the shutdown, before anything happened, I had my passport appointment, you know. Right. No, I had gotten my passport, but I had my TSA appointment. That's what it was because I had TSA precheck.
Haley Spades I was like, if I'm doing global entry. Yes, I did high five. Oh yeah. It was like $15 extra that's why. Yeah, I had the whole interview. I had the whole.
Matt Slayer Oh, it was so fucking worth. It blew me. There is nothing more satisfying than watching people waiting to find a customs line when you just go to the kiosk, you were sitting, waving at customs. It was like, I'm out bitches now.
Haley Spades Literally like me going to Mexico and my friends on global entry and I'm like, you guys, you have TSA PreCheck, they have clear, but like that's a different line.
Matt Slayer And that's only for coming in.
Haley Spades Yeah. So yeah, I'm like your.
Matt Slayer Global entry is life global interest?
Haley Spades No, no, I made sure to get that. But it was like two weeks before the pandemic. I got my passport, TSA PreCheck and global entry because my graduation present to myself, I hadn't booked anything. Thank God I wanted to go to Japan. Oh yeah. I wanted to go to Japan.
Matt Slayer Is Tokyo's my happy place. My audience is rolling their eyes because every time Japan comes up to like oh, here he goes. Tokyo is fucking amazing. I will, I will regale you was shit off air because my audience is heard at way too fucking much. I love it. They're fucking love it. They're I want to go back, but they are still pretty fucking long.
Haley Spades Oh, no. Yeah, it's China. All the Asian country. No, no. For the most part. Yeah.
Matt Slayer South Korea just reopened.
Haley Spades Oh, my God. I mean, that's a good spot to.
Matt Slayer Oh, no, no. I'm going to Seoul.
Haley Spades Like, yeah, my brother in law is in the army in an army military, not army. He's Air Force. He he was stationed well, like deployed in South Korea, and he freaking loved it.
Matt Slayer Seoul is supposed to be fucking amazing and much cheaper than Tokyo. So I've been to Tokyo twice. South Korean. So if you're vaccinated, get a COVID test before you leave on a COVID test when you arrive in country. Don't have. According to Quentin.
Haley Spades Good to know.
Matt Slayer So I am going to call it here folks. I am going to South Korea this fucking year.
Haley Spades I believe it.
Matt Slayer I believe I am finding a way. I'm yeah, I'm going to go get fucking the ignorant in fucking South Korea.
Haley Spades Like, oh, drink that soju. Oh my God. My brother in law brought some South Korean soju home I remember he came, he came to New Orleans and brought it with me. Was like, you all think I was underage? It was like, you want to drink it? I was like, You got to.
Matt Slayer I got two bottles of soldier in the fridge right now.
Haley Spades I like the real the real soldiers are the Americans. So would you.
Matt Slayer I mean, I bought it that Korean market, so I don't know how.
Haley Spades Americanized. So you can only get Korean like real like where you don't know the alcohol content in Korea and it's like it's like regulated there. As I'm like, if you got to the Korean market, it's probably the American version.
Matt Slayer Whatever it does the trick.
Haley Spades Yeah, but but the but the fun is buying the soju in Korea where you don't know how much alcohol is.
Matt Slayer I don't I'm.
Haley Spades And then people are just obliterated in the streets. It's it's like a normal thing in Korea.
Matt Slayer Oh, and I'm going to I'm going to be one of those people.
Haley Spades Yes, you are. I yeah, I don't know something about Asian countries. You know, like the culture shock was like what Drew and I love Japanese Asian culture, like anime, you know, video like, I don't know, I just I love it. I love it. I'm a very American girl. Right? But I love it. And that's why I wanted that to be my first international trip.
Matt Slayer Japan actually was my first international trip.
Haley Spades That's awesome. It was culture shock. That's what I want.
Matt Slayer Oh, it is. It's more of a culture shock than you'd think. Yeah. Because just it's little things like talking on a train is considered there and people just don't do it or everything's super or ever. Even when we were getting kicked out of places, there were so polite about it that we it felt like we had done something wrong because visible tattoos very much have criminal connotation in Tokyo.
Matt Slayer And the first year I was there, my tattoo, our suspicion neck tattoos, I didn't cover up like we.
Haley Spades They don't like it.
Matt Slayer I thought I knew it was a thing. I didn't realize how much of a thing.
Haley Spades I didn't realize they were kick you out to places for. Oh yeah.
Matt Slayer We got refuse service in like ten places over the course of a trip to no.
Haley Spades And Japan where long sleeves.
Matt Slayer Literally we would roll in the fuckin bars and restaurants and so sorry we're closed. So sorry.
Haley Spades No, you're not you got people in there.
Matt Slayer Yeah but we'd be like, oh our bad. And then we were out on the street and like wait a minute. There were definitely people eating in there.
Haley Spades Fuck yeah, that makes sense. Yeah, that was my first planned international trip. Didn't happen because we're all shut down but I had my passport, I had everything in line. So now that everything's calmed down, I'm like more settled into a place in California. I decided I'm like, I'm going to go to Mexico. I'm going to go to Bloom.
Haley Spades Nothing wrong with it. Yeah. All right. Yeah, yeah. So this is being released in two weeks already be gone. So actually, I might be in to Bloom, which works out. I mean by that point people I know, but I was keeping it a little bit of a secret just because I want to be like, boom, I'm into bloom.
Matt Slayer So much for the promotional cycle on a.
Haley Spades Down.
Matt Slayer I want to bother you on a vacation to promote the episode.
Haley Spades But once I'm there, people know, but I'm like leading up to it. Oh, no.
Matt Slayer I'm just giving a shit about my holding up. So while you're on vacation.
Haley Spades It's like the little like, where is she going home? She's going overseas. Oh, where's she going now? You know, so I wanted Japan to be my first international.
Matt Slayer Oh, it's so good.
Haley Spades So forth. So my future, it is. I don't know when, but it's so my future right now I'm going, well, I'm going to bloom. And then in June, I'm going to Portugal.
Matt Slayer Fuck yeah.
Haley Spades I'm glad I'm over a music festival. It's called Secret Project. It's put on by Insomniac. It's Secret Project Portugal. It's replacing EDC. Portugal. Yeah, it's all house techno drum and bass and disco. And it was so cheap in Portugal is a very cheap destination to go to. I mean, your flight's expensive, but your Airbnb for like five people for like four days is like $500.
Matt Slayer Oh yeah. No, it's.
Haley Spades Cheap as fuck holes.
Matt Slayer The whole Iberian Peninsula is fucking cheap for something so cheap.
Haley Spades I had my festival take it was only $150 for three days and.
Matt Slayer All drugs are decriminalized in case you want to get real weird.
Haley Spades Oh, yeah. Oh, man. You know, the rave lifestyle. People like to get weird they do.
Matt Slayer Do you ever fuck around with hallucinogens or anything or not?
Haley Spades LSD or mushrooms? I don't know. Whatever. I was like 18, 19. I had dropped acid a couple of times, but honestly, I hated how long it lasts.
Matt Slayer Acid is such a time commitment.
Haley Spades I'm like, after 2 hours, I'm like, Man, I got at least another 8 hours of this. Okay, I'm done. And then you're not done. You're committed. Oh yeah. So that's like my one thing with like, psychedelics. I'm like, the time commitment. I like I wanted to be over after a certain point. So I dropped a few times and thankfully at a young age where I learned it did not like it.
Matt Slayer Says shrooms last so.
Haley Spades Think it's like six to 8 hours or.
Matt Slayer To four to six. Really? Yeah.
Haley Spades And then acid is like it's eight to 12.
Matt Slayer Yeah.
Haley Spades Oh.
Matt Slayer No, I did though. Mushrooms can be eight because I decided on Monday night that I was going to do mushrooms at midnight and at 8 a.m., I'm like, Why can't I fall asleep? Still fuck.
Haley Spades Oh, wait, what? You couldn't fall asleep on mushrooms? I feel like, I feel like the times I took mushrooms, I was able to fall. I didn't take a lot, though. I was able to fall asleep and fight, like just by accident.
Matt Slayer So I definitely took a little over an hour. Yeah.
Haley Spades Yeah. Oh, no, no, no. It's a lot.
Matt Slayer I'm a much bigger person than.
Haley Spades Yeah, I'm like, man, I would take, like, a gram, gram and a half.
Matt Slayer Oh, yeah. No, I took him twice, which is 3.5 grams, so the people can't do math on that also. And I'm out after an hour and a half because normally, like, 45 to an hour, like your metabolism you start feeling a meal hour and a half, and I'm like, I am feeling shit. And I did another stomach cup.
Matt Slayer And then like an hour after that, I'm like, Oh.
Haley Spades Lit.
Matt Slayer Yep, I'm, I am double tripping now.
Haley Spades Yeah. And yeah.
Matt Slayer And then I was like, I still fall asleep and I have a call it 1130. Fuck.
Haley Spades Oh my God.
Matt Slayer I eventually fell asleep and my alarm went off on my already. Fuck.
Haley Spades Yeah, yeah. I don't know. I learned my lesson very early that I didn't like psychedelics like I was 18, 19 late last summer I dropped honestly I think the most LA times I dropped I was 18 and I think yeah, the last time I did acid I was with my friend who it was her first time and I dropped with her and I was in that moment I was like, I think I'm done.
Matt Slayer So I found I have like shrooms a lot better than I. I said this point, it's less of a time commitment and like depending on the batch of acid, it's like, Oh, this is super intense or this is really not good. Yeah. Body high.
Haley Spades Yeah.
Matt Slayer Well, shrooms too soon. Much more consistent.
Haley Spades Yeah. Yeah. I don't know, Maya, my lesson very early. I was like, I'm done with psychedelics. I'm like, maybe in the future I wouldn't mind dabbling a little bit, but, like, I don't know, I just. I hate it. I don't know. I hated the whole, like, feeling like I guess I didn't want to let go of control. I didn't like that feeling.
Haley Spades I was like, oh, I was like, why am I like this? And my poor friend, the first time she dropped acid and I was already like, I think it was like my. Yeah, only thing I like dropped like three times before I decided to put it down for good. I was like, it was her first time, and she was stuck in a blue mask poor girl.
Haley Spades I remember she was like, We're in college. And for some reason we dropped in our apartment clubhouse, like, you know, like, really have like computers and, like, pool tables and like TVs and chill areas. For some reason, we were hanging out there. She was like, somebody would, like, walk past us. And she was like, they know I know they don't.
Haley Spades She's like, no, no, no. They know that we're on we're on acid. And I was like, no, they don't. I don't know anything. They're gone.
Matt Slayer And why do you care?
Haley Spades And she was like, What a big hole. Campus police. And I'm like, They're not going to call points. And she would calm down and then, like, do it all over again. And I was like, You're stuck in a loop. I was like, You need to, like, relax yeah.
Matt Slayer That is it. That is not a good trip.
Haley Spades No, she was like, in a loop. But I mean, she's continued on with psychedelics past that. So good for her, I guess. But I have decided I'm I'm good in that aspect, but I am excited to go to Portugal. It'll be my first time going to like Europe, that area. So I'm excited at and really good music, you know, like drum and bass.
Matt Slayer Oh, no. And Portugal's like, Are you going to be in Lisbon or are you? Huh? Are you going to be in Lisbon?
Haley Spades It's called Por Camilo.
Matt Slayer I don't know where in the country that.
Haley Spades Is. It's like the beach. Like the beach. And then I'm thinking about, you know, Croatia does like yacht week around that time. So I was like, ooh, cool. Because, you know, whenever you go to Europe, you don't just go for a weekend. Hello, you're going to make like two weeks out of it. Yeah. Like if you're traveling that distance.
Matt Slayer It's crazy how easy it is to get around Europe. 20, 17 trip. I went from Amsterdam to Germany back to Amsterdam to Finland. Back to Amsterdam, then back to the States.
Haley Spades Yeah, it's very. Yeah, you have that mass transport, mass public transport. It's like.
Matt Slayer Well, I mean the flights.
Haley Spades And the flights and the flights it's like, it's like going to Vegas from LA. Yeah.
Matt Slayer Seriously. Absolutely. I mean it was an hour and then we went in fucking October 1st, so.
Haley Spades Yeah, yeah, yeah. I'm sure that was lamb. I got the beer.
Matt Slayer October 1st felt so much fuckin fun. It wasn't even just the beer, it was the fucking food was amazing. I mean, unfortunately, your dietary restrictions, you wouldn't. It was a lot of fucking like pork.
Haley Spades For a lot.
Matt Slayer A lot of sausage and like, schnitzel, but roast duck was amazing.
Haley Spades Oh, really? Well, that's all. You can be screened, dog. I don't know. Ducks are cute.
Matt Slayer They're rapists.
Haley Spades But they're cute.
Matt Slayer They're rapists.
Haley Spades But they're cute.
Matt Slayer Quack, quack. Like I forgive rape if they're cute. No, no.
Haley Spades I just. I think animals are cute.
Matt Slayer I'm just positive.
Haley Spades Also. I mean.
Matt Slayer They're delicious. The roast duck was delicious.
Haley Spades I mean, it's bird. Well, sure tastes like bird.
Matt Slayer Duck's a little greasy or them one chicken alligator. Not not good or not not good or gator's.
Haley Spades Really gamey, but it tastes like chicken to me.
Matt Slayer Oh, no.
Haley Spades It's like gamey chicken.
Matt Slayer I oh, I miss black and chicken from New Orleans. Like our black and gator eater.
Haley Spades Pork and chicken and gator go to New Orleans.
Matt Slayer They are the salt.
Haley Spades Yeah.
Matt Slayer Oh, that's a little I know.
Haley Spades I know. I need to go back soon. Uh, I was going to go for Jazzfest, but I'm going to Miami and then to Lamb, so no Jazz Fest in.
Matt Slayer My always next.
Haley Spades Year. Yeah. Yeah, it's always going to come back.
Matt Slayer That's one of those New Orleans staples. You can always go again.
Haley Spades Yeah, I just. I don't like to be in New Orleans there in the summer. So now that summer's coming out, I'm like, See you guys in the fall, right?
Matt Slayer Like when it's, you know, you can actually stand if I can be here.
Haley Spades Even living there. Oh, my God. Oh, my God. I would walk outside and, like, go to, like, the grocery store, like two brothers and go get some chicken whenever I live there, you know, talking about brothers, chicken yeah. You don't. I'm about that good fricking gas station chicken that just hits. I would walk there like a block and I'd be drenched in sweat.
Haley Spades Larry, I need a shower.
Matt Slayer Yeah, this is part of the reason I don't want to live there.
Haley Spades Oh, it's hot. Well, a lot of people who live there, like they leave during the summer. That's why summer's slow season and not California and New Orleans, like Louisiana in general, for tourists slow to freak and hot. And it's there's hurricanes. It's too fricking hot and hurricanes like, you know, nobody wants to be there for that. Nobody. Not even the locals.
Matt Slayer No. Fuck, no.
Haley Spades For now. As I was like, if I go back anytime soon, it's not going to be here in the summer. It's going to be September or October or September.
Matt Slayer It'll be too fucking hot still.
Haley Spades Yeah. They have the fried chicken fest there during my birthday, and I remember walking there because I lived in downtown. I mean, my ex-boyfriend, when you walk there, oh my God, I'm so hot. We were like drinking, you know? You know, it's too hot. And you're drinking alcohol and you're not even getting drunk. It's it's too hot. You're drinking all this alcohol.
Haley Spades You're like, Man, that's too hot. Yeah, that's how it was.
Matt Slayer All the fucking.
Haley Spades Worst. I know, but it was my birthday, and I was like, the fried chicken festival, but it was like, 85. 88 degrees was 100% humidity. Fucking worse. I'm like, 85. Doesn't sound too bad. And so you throw at 100% humidity.
Matt Slayer Yeah, fuck that.
Haley Spades Plus sticky or sticky.
Matt Slayer That's.
Haley Spades Gross. Can't breathe.
Matt Slayer It's part of the reason I don't like Miami all that much either.
Haley Spades Like it does get humid right now. It's not too hot.
Matt Slayer But that'll.
Haley Spades Change hot and that will.
Matt Slayer Come true.
Haley Spades Yeah, it's, I'm like this weekend's probably like my last weekend where it's not like treacherous because it's going to be like in the nineties and LA this weekend. Miami it's like 84 82.
Matt Slayer Much more humidity in Miami though.
Haley Spades Yeah, but I don't know. I don't know. I feel like, I don't know, I feel like it being 95 in LA well especially in the valley.
Matt Slayer Yeah. That's why I try not to go there.
Haley Spades Oh no, not though. I'd rather be in Miami. Plus I'll be sleeping all day.
Matt Slayer I'll only be out at night.
Haley Spades Yeah, I'm only going to be out at night. And so it's maybe like in the sixties at that point.
Matt Slayer They'll be fine. It'll be fine.
Haley Spades Yeah.
Matt Slayer So where else do you want to go besides Asia? Portugal.
Haley Spades Bali. It would be nice. I like tropical places, you know, Bali, it'd be really nice. Even Canada, I don't know. That's not tropical. I know, but I'm saying, like, I don't know. Like the mountains in the forests would be really nice. I know Canada has some amazing, like, national parks, and that's what I want to go see there.
Haley Spades Niagara Falls, even from Canada, not from us. I don't know. I feel like a be different.
Matt Slayer I if you can do it, I always highly recommend Cuba.
Haley Spades Yeah, Cuba.
Matt Slayer Know what you're most rad.
Haley Spades They just open that back up, right? Like recently.
Matt Slayer So I don't know.
Haley Spades Because they have the sanctions. So the border.
Matt Slayer Oh, at the end of Obama's term. Yeah he made it so you could direct and far from the states to Cuba, you thought technically can't go there for tourism.
Haley Spades There you go there for.
Matt Slayer To support the Cuban people. You have to.
Haley Spades Tourism.
Matt Slayer You have to write an affidavit to the State Department one before you leave the state in while you're doing. I went for journalism. I brought my podcast gear with me.
Haley Spades Yeah, easy.
Matt Slayer But you're not legally allowed to go for tourism. It was rad. Cuba was fucking rad.
Haley Spades Hmm. Stop. First on my list.
Matt Slayer Let me put you on this. No. Where else can you go in the world that has no Americana? That is not an act of war zone.
Haley Spades Good point.
Matt Slayer Like there's no Starbucks. There's no McDonald's. There's no Burger King. There's no.
Haley Spades Yeah, that's why. I don't know. I want culture shock, right?
Matt Slayer And believe me, you can't really get on the Internet there. And so, like, it was ten days of just being off the grid. Everyone's on a hustle, like, a while. Hustle. We were in downtown Havana. And, ah, everybody was a little bit outside town trying to get a cab back to the airport and be one of my friends who natively speaks Spanish.
Matt Slayer Like, like, oh, this guy. I'll take you. We get this car. He's not a cab. He's just some dude who like taking the money.
Haley Spades Oh, my God.
Matt Slayer There are actually checkpoints set up where people were checking to make sure that we were actually in legal cabs.
Haley Spades Wow.
Matt Slayer We had people selling those counterfeit cigars out of their apartment. Like, everyone's on a hustle, and it's a wild fucking place saying it was really cold. The beaches were beautiful. I don't. I mean, crawfish. So I'm assuming you eat lobster.
Haley Spades Yeah. Yeah.
Matt Slayer Like, they brought lobsters out to the beach for us for, like, 18 us.
Haley Spades Oh, my God. That's, like, nothing to pay. Like, 40 bucks in the United States for lobster, right?
Matt Slayer Not for them to set up a table on the beach for you. Like we're at the beach and, like, do you guys want lobsters? Yeah, that's sort of fucking tables for us on the beach and brought the lobsters out to us on the beach. Oh, my.
Haley Spades God. Nice.
Matt Slayer And the people just run through coconuts full of rum, like, came out of, like, five bucks. You asked for a coconut full of rum.
Haley Spades Hi.
Matt Slayer Yeah, it was a good place.
Haley Spades Good to know. I'll write that down on my travel notebook.
Matt Slayer And it's one of those things, really, you get to be like, yo, you ever been to Cuba? And most people are like, No, they're not.
Haley Spades No clue.
Matt Slayer Yeah, I have no fucking idea. It's funny, I like the Cuban jazz clubs are really cool.
Haley Spades Guy.
Matt Slayer And we got a bottle of like $25 at the.
Haley Spades Club you got in the club? I was like, yes, like in the club. Because in the club normally you're paying like $200 if you're like 300.
Matt Slayer Dollar bottle services, like 500.
Haley Spades Oh my God.
Matt Slayer So like paying retail in the club was.
Haley Spades Like, is like, all right, yeah, yeah.
Matt Slayer I'm like watching live jazz. I could dream bottle service that fucking retail cause it was, I had a really fucking good time on that and we had to sing there and be like ten bedroom, one bath house. So we were paying 500 a night for between like ten people.
Haley Spades Yeah, it's not bad. It's not bad.
Matt Slayer And we had a staff like we had dudes there that were doing serious bartending at night and then like during the day they were cookies professional one for the next like five bucks to us a day.
Haley Spades Not bad. Yeah.
Matt Slayer Fresh fruit like, you know, a lot of pork in the diet, but.
Haley Spades Oh my God.
Matt Slayer But the fact that, like, they're making us, like, fresh fruit juice and fresh fruit in the morning. Oh, I did not realize how much I was going to enjoy being there. I mean, I had a crew. I regularly travel around the world honestly, Cuba was exciting to me because I read a Playboy article, and like, the early dozens were like this, often called restaurant areas, which are state sponsored restaurants in people's homes.
Matt Slayer So, like, essentially home cooking in people's homes. And then just. Nancy yeah, we're just kind of fucking traversing neighborhoods looking because like, you just house covered in the uninsured, like, oh, that's a restaurant, a particular Rollins and people's homes and like the, the cook for you who are like it it's really fucking.
Haley Spades Check it out. No, for sure. I mean, it sounds like something I'm down and check out. Maybe not like this year, but in the future.
Matt Slayer Yeah. I don't know what the situation about going there at the moment is we thankfully went like in February 17th. So it's like Obama had just listed the restrictions. Trump had just gotten into office and we were super fed Trump. Trump was going to lock it back down and he did like a couple of months later. But I was on one of the first direct U.S. flights from New York to Cuba.
Haley Spades Oh, I'm going to use the restroom. Really? Quick.
Matt Slayer Well, actually, we're going to actually wrap this motherfucker up. Going to call last call.
Haley Spades So you have to pee.
Matt Slayer We're going to we're going to do the sign offs and then you can urinate as much as you like. So in the last call on this motherfucker, hey, where can I find you on the things?
Haley Spades So my Twitter is Haley Spades. My Instagram is right. Now. I just got deleted again. Xo, xo, Haley Spades. My only fans. Haley Spades, Pornhub. Haley, say everything. Everything's pretty much Haley said, so you can find me pretty easily as long as you have my Twitter and Instagram and only fans here said.
Matt Slayer Fuck yeah. And if you want to see Haley at your local club, request her.
Haley Spades Yes, please.
Matt Slayer Now she's.
Haley Spades Excited.
Matt Slayer She does feature dancing so she could be in a club near you.
Haley Spades Yeah.
Matt Slayer And as always, you can find me at matt underscore sa and Twitter Meslier on Instagram, Madoff Insider on Facebook, Twitter, Twitter Slash Madoff Insider. You can find the pitcher on the pitcher on the com slash Matt Slater. You can find the podcast and now a drink on Twitter. And now we're trying underscore on Instagram and until next week.
Matt Slayer Drink up, motherfuckers.
Haley Spades Thank you.